A guide to Lizzington
by Amazon Star
Summary: I ship Lizzington and this is my attempt to overcome writer's block.
1. Oh no, he's hot!

I haven't written for a long time so this is my attempt to overcome writer's block. No hating on the pairing, please! Enjoy!

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** A guide to Lizzington**

**Season 1**

**Episode 1**:

Red: Agent Keen, what a pleasure! I've waited for this moment for a long time!

Lizzie: Damn, he's handsome, what do I do?

Lizzie's morality: Show him that you mean business!

Lizzie: I shall now state the obvious... I'm here.

Red's libido: Yes, I can see that.

Red: I know everything about you!

Lizzie: Everything?

Red: I know about your obsession with James Spader, but I don't blame you. Who wouldn't love him?

Lizzie: * screaming internally*

_Then..._

Red: Tell me about the scar on your palm. I've noticed how you stroke it.

Red's libido: Yes...stroke it...

Lizzie: *shows him her scar*

Red's libido: This is a major turn on for me!

_Later..._

Lizzie: Are you the one who did this?

Red (*poker face*): Did what?

Lizzie: He told me that you're obsessed with me!

Red: Oh, you have no idea...

Lizzie:*stabs him with a pen*

Red's neck: Auch, that hurts!

Red's libido: I think she likes it rough...

_More later..._

Lizzie's morality: That is a chemical weapon!

Red: We're gonna make a great team! I love you already!


	2. The perfect date

**A/N**: Thank you so much for all the reviews/follow/favorites, they mean so much to me!

I hope this second chapter didn't dissapoint!

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Episode 2:

Red: If you had any idea how far I've traveled to see you again, Lizzie! "_But I would walk 500 miles, And I would walk 500 more, Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles, To fall down at your door."_

Lizzie: Don't call me Lizzie, it's hard for me to focus when you say my name like that!

Lizzie's morality: Show him who's the boss!

Lizzie: So let me tell you how this is gonna work. I ask the questions, you answer them. Screw with me, and I walk. Also, you must call me mistress!

Red's libido: She's gonna be so much fun in bed... I can't wait!

A few moments later...

Red: You should come. Just the two of us...no clumsy agents in the bushes. Sounds like the perfect date for me!

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: Before we do this, let me be clear... I'm not here to socialize. I have no interest in having dinner with you, nor do we have the time.

Lizzie: Yes, a date with me should last all night, not just 20 minutes.

Lizzie's morality: We meet your contact, we get the name of the freelancer's next victim, and we go. Understood?

Red: I agree with you completely. But it is a restaurant, and it is dinnertime. We're gonna have so much fun!

Lizzie's morality: Did I just agreed to a date?

Lizzie: Yes, you did.

Red's hat: Hello, Lizzie, it's nice to finally met you!

Lizzie's morality: So, what does this liaison look like?

Red: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

"_We__'__re up all night to get lucky_."

In the restaurant...

Red: Anyone asks, you're my girlfriend from Ann Arbor.

Lizzie's morality: Absolutely not.

Lizzie: *secretly wishing it was truth*

Red: Hey, that hurt! Fine. You can be my daughter, although my thoughts about you aren't paternal at all, and because of this sentence people will think that you are my real daughter!

Red: S'il vous plaît, pour madame, un cocktail de I'aviation. I want to seduce her, and plus she doesn't know what to order. Chardonnay my ass...

Lizzie: Are you trying to seduce me with your french knowledge? Because it's working...

Red: Tell me my profile. I so want to know how you... see things. It boost my ego to hear you talk about me!

Lizzie: You're a loner. You keep your distance. You travel freely through foreign lands. You're rootless. You're very comfortable here with your glass of scotch, but you're just as comfortable sleeping in a cave with rebels or sharing dinner in somehole-in-the-wall noodle shop. Your closest friends are strangers. You understand that tight bonds can make you vulnerable, so you're careful not to have any. And that's why you're so conflicted about me. You need me and you hate that about yourself, because it makes you vulnerable. And this is how you profile someone.*like a lady*

Red: Oh, no, she figured out! Quick, ask her something about her husband!

Lizzie's morality: It's been only 35 minutes and I'm starting to enjoy our date. We can't let that happen!

_Then..._

Lizzie: So, you want to go to the party?

Red: Oh, I thought you'd never ask.


	3. The G-spot talk

Episode 3:

Lizzie: Do you expect me to believe that- a secret meeting with the mysterious Wujing?

Red: Intriguing, isn't it?

Lizzie: He's a myth.

Red's libido: That's what they said about deep throat and the G-spot.

Lizzie: Thanks for the mental image. Now I can't stop thinking about that!

Red: I assure you Wujing is quite real, and he's hired me. Now you have the chance to catch him. I've already forwarded them your cover.

Lizzie: What? What cover? I'm still wondering if you can find my G-spot...

Red: Carolyn Givins, PhD in Applied Physics from M.I.T. I've told them you're my new encryption specialist...and my girlfriend, lover, sweetheart, honey. Which term you prefer.

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: If I'm gonna help you, I want something in return.

Red: Such as?

Lizzie: A night with you... I meant to say I want the truth.

Red: Well, then, we need to move quickly. Things are already in play.

_Then..._

Lizzie: Red, stop touching me! You must distract them, not me. First the G-spot talk and now the touching... it's like you really want to seduce me.

Red's libido: Oh, you have no idea...

_More later..._

Lizzie's morality: You didn't have to kill him.

Red: I believe I will always do whatever I feel I have to do

to keep you alive! It's my way of saying " I love you".

Lizzie: That's so sweet, but I'm still mad at you for saving my life and for killing that man.

Lizzie's morality: You act like we're the same. You're wrong. I have a life, people who care about me. But you...this is all you have.

Red: I have you!

Lizzie: *slightly less mad at you*


	4. Keep your hands off my girl!

Episode 4:

Red's hat: Hello, Lizzie! It's been a long time since I last saw you...

Red: Why don't you sit next to me?

Lizzie's morality: Nope, I think I'll pass.

Red:*rejected*

_Later..._

_On the phone:_

Red: Sweetheart, not really the most convenient time for me.

Lizzie: I don't give a rat's ass. Where are you? I need you!

Lizzie's morality: I meant to say that I need you to help me with my case, that's all... Why else would I need you?

Red: I'm in Haiti.

Lizzie: Doing what?

Red's libido: Thinking about you...

Red: Keeping up appearances. I'm a criminal. The minute I stop being one, I become quite useless to you. Let's commit the perfect crime: first I'll steal your heart then you'll steal mine!

Lizzie:*considering it*

_Then..._

_On the phone:_

Lizzie's morality: What do you want?

Red's libido: I want you!

Red: I've been thinking about your case... and about you.

_Later..._

Red: Hello, Lizzy. The effects will dissipate soon. You're gonna be fine! Excuse me just a minute, I need to kill the Stewmaker. Nobody touches my girlfriend except me!

_More later..._

Lizzie's morality: You're no better than him.

Red: You gonna tell on me, Lizzy? Tell Harold how bad I've been?

Red's libido: I've been very bad, you must punish me...

Lizzie's morality: You're a monster.

Red's heart: _"Do you really want to hurt me, Do you really want to make me cry?"_

Lizzie's morality: How can you live with that?

Red: By saving your life!

Red's heart: Fuck my life! Donald gets a hug for doing nothing and what do I get in return? I get hurt!


	5. I'm that jealous girl

Episode 5:

Lizzie: What is this place?

Red's libido: Something of a hideaway. Just for the two of us... if you know what I mean!

Red: Please sit next to me!

Lizzie's morality: No thanks, I'll pass this time.

Lizzie: What is that?

Red: No earthly idea. Some sort of distilled alcohol, I think.

Lizzie: Are you trying to get me drunk?

Red: *nervous chuckling* Why would you think that?

_Later..._

Red: This is hilarious. Fredrick wrote to the editor of the Washington Post almost every day... thank you... about any and every subject.

Lizzie: Why is Luli wearing only a shirt? Is that your shirt? It's not like I care...

Lizzie's morality: I need to know what you're not telling me about the Courier.

Red's libido: And what do I get in return?

Lizzie's morality: My gratitude. Is that enough or you want something else?

Red's libido: Well, I suppose your gratitude is something...

_Then..._

Red : Her name's Laurence Dechambou. She's ex-French intelligence. She now makes a handsome living selling secrets, mostly of a technological nature. I really don't understand any of it. But she's clearly stepping up on this one, trying to make a legacy for herself. She owns that nightclub.

Red's libido: Last time I was there, we had a great deal of fun, until she tried to strangle me with her stocking.

Lizzie: First Luli, and now Dechambeau! Are you trying to make me jealous?

Red: Why? Is it working?

Lizzie: No, of course not! As if...

_Later..._

Red: I'll make her talk.

Lizzie: How?

Red's libido: You don't want me to answer that.

_More later..._

Lizzie's morality: I don't even know why I'm here.

Red: We both know that's not quite true…


	6. We are never ever ever getting back toge

Episode 6:

Red's hat: Hello, there, beautiful! We meet again... did you miss me?

Red: Nothing happens by chance. That's why I'm here, Lizzy. Because there's a woman... Gina Zanetakos.

Lizzie: I don't know who that is. Is she an ex of yours? How many lovers have you had?

Red's libido: You don't want me to answer that.

Red: No, Gina wasn't my lover, she is Tom's lover. I bet you didn't see that coming!

Lizzie: What?

Lizzie's morality: Wait, what?

_Later..._

Lizzie: My husband is innocent.

Red: No, he isn't!

Lizzie: Yes, he is!

Red: No, he isn't!

_Until..._

Lizzie's morality: He isn't innocent.

Lizzie: I didn't know where else to go. We found a picture of Tom in her house. He said he doesn't know her, but clearly he does. So much is happening, and I just don't know how to process it all. I mean, a part of me thinks that you're manipulating this whole thing and you're trying to ruin my life. But that's just a part of...But if I'm wrong about Tom... If he isn't who... I don't think I can handle any of it without him. I feel like I'm drowning, like I don't know what's real or who I can trust.

Red: You can trust me! OMG, we are holding hands! Our relationship is getting serious...

_Then..._

Red's libido: Hello, Lizzy. What can I do for you?

Lizzie: Don't flirt with me in front of your friend, Dembe!

_On the phone..._

Lizzie's morality: All traffic would have to be diverted to New Orleans. Hanar's profits would soar. They'd be the only game in the Gulf.

Red: That's my girl(friend)!

_More later..._

Lizzie: You and I... we're done. " _We are never ever ever getting back together, We are never ever ever getting back together_"

Red: I heard about Tom.

Lizzie: The passports? Forged. The money in the box? Traced to an offshore account of yours.

Red: I can only lead you to the truth. I can't make you believe it.

Lizzie: The truth is that you're a sick, twisted man. I thought we had something special!

Lizzie's morality: I don't understand why you would do this, any of it! Go to hell!

Red's heart: Conceal, don't feel, don't let her see!

**A/N**: Not so sure about this chapter, I hope it didn't disappoint!


	7. One day you'll be mine!

Episode 7:

_On the phone..._

Lizzie: This is Special Agent Keen.

Red: Agent Keen, I have a tip. You're a winter, not an autumn. Stop wearing olive.

Red's libido: You'll definitely look better with nothing at all...

Lizzie's morality: I don't have time for this.

Red: So you're still mad at me?

Lizzie's morality: Of course I am! You know, as much as I love our little talks, you're holding up a line for people that might have actual information.

Red: This isn't a social call. I can identify the man you're looking for, Lizzie.

Lizzie's morality: Okay. Who is he?

Red: Phones are so impersonal. Why don't we meet for show and tell in 30 minutes? Dembe will forward you a location. If you care to hear me out, wonderful. Otherwise, good luck with your case!

Red's libido: I know ways to make you forgive me...

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: Betraying your country and auctioning off its secrets. Where have I heard that before?

Red: Hey, I am more handsome than him! You want to compare him to me? Be my guest. I'm perfectly comfortable with what I am. I am your big bad handsome man!

_Then..._

Red: You should come, Lizzie. We could have a therapy session on the way, talk out our problems. Have you ever been to Cuba?

Lizzie: I'm sorry. All my tropical wear's in the wash.

Red's libido: You'd look positively radiant in a Guayabera dress. That dress would look awfully nice on the floor next to my bed...

_In the elevator..._

Red's libido: I'm gonna stare at your ass until you'll forgive me!

Red: I'm sorry you're upset with me!

Lizzie's morality: That would imply I care enough to be angry.

Red: I might do the same in your position.

Red's libido: Yes, position...

Lizzie's morality: Me + You = BAD IDEA

Red: Me – You = NO FUN

_On the phone..._

Lizzie's morality: What do you need? And please don't say that you need me!

Red: A bottle of beer and a pork sandwich. How about you? What do you need? How about Barnes' location?

_Later... on the phone_

Red: Either you accidentally dialed the wrong number... or you're calling because you've hit a dead end. So, which is it?

Lizzie's morality: Barnes got away, and the trail's dried up.

Lizzie: Now you're the one who's mad at me?

Red: You g-men are top shelf. Let me guess: Ressler slipped on a banana peel?

Lizzie's morality: Do you know how to find him?

Red: I'm not a gumball machine, Lizzie. You don't get to just twist the handle whenever you want a treat. We can't keep doing this little waltz.

Lizzie's morality: The reason Barnes is still out there is because I let him slip away. And it's only a matter of time before he kills again.

Lizzie: So, please, I need your help! I'm not mad at you anymore and you're my favorite criminal. Is that enough?

Red: Ah, music to my ears. What was that last part again?

Lizzie: I need your help!

_More later..._

Lizzie: What are you doing here?

Red's hat: Hello, Lizzie! It's a shame I don't see you often!

Red: I brought you a souvenir.

Red: I take it from the coroner's van that Barnes is no longer with us. Pity.

Lizzie's morality: Tell that to the families of the people he murdered.

Red: Say what you will about Frederick, but someone who's willing to burn the world down to protect the one person they care about... that's a man I understand!

Red's heart: I will do anything for you!

Lizzie: Is that meant to be directed at me?

Red: No, of course not! Aren't you presumptuous?

Lizzie: I don't need your protection.

Red: I wouldn't be so sure about that.

Lizzie's morality: But I do need you to do this job. I've accepted that. And believe it or not, I appreciate what you do for the bureau. And at work, you and I are partners. But that's where this relationship needs to end...at work. You need to stop trying to seduce me because it's working!

Red: You know the problem with drawing lines in the sand? With a breath of air, they disappear. " _The chemistry between me and you - Ah baby, You can try to stop it but it won't quit, You say you don't when you know that you want it, I know, one day you'll be mine!"_

Red: You may not like me. You may not understand how or why I do what I do. But I'm here because you want answers to questions you haven't even thought of yet. Now, if that doesn't matter to you, the solution is simple... I get in this car and I disappear.

Lizzie: You're offering to walk away?

Red: I'm not going to beg you to allow me the privilege of helping you. So, say the word, and I'm gone. Tell me to go, Lizzie!

Lizzie: No, please don't go! I need you!

Red: Then I guess I'll see you tomorrow.

**A/N: **Thank you so much for all the reviews/favorite, they mean so much to me!


	8. I ship you two!

Episode 8:

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Absolutely not. I'm not giving you access to the FBI's ViCAP system!

Red: Then you'll just have to find another criminal to flirt with Elizabeth Keen and make fun of Agent Ressler.

Lizzie's morality: Does this mean you know who took down that cargo plane?

Red: You're speaking as if an individual is responsible for this. It's far bigger than you might think.

Red's libido: It really is far bigger than you might think...

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Get a room,you two!

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: You have a suburban housewife printing fake money out of her garage!

Red's hat: I'm happy to see you too!

Red: Mary is an artist. She has a tremendous gift.

Lizzie: I've been calling your people all morning. Luli didn't pick up.

Red: Luli didn't pick up because we are busy.

Lizzie: I'm sure you are. Well, then you should have dug that chip out of your damn neck.* stares at his lips*

Red: Did you just stare at my lips?

Lizzie:*blushing* Of course not! Why would you think that?

Red: And it's not the first time when I've caught you looking. Well, you're here now, so what's on your mind? Beside me, of course.

Lizzie: I don't think of you that often!

Lizzie's morality: We searched the home address listed for both suspects and were able to pull some prints. They belong to Nathaniel Wolff.

Red: I never tire of being correct.

Red's libido: And I'm sure you are attracted to me, you can't deny it!

Red: I understand your father is not well.

Lizzie: Excuse me? How do you know this?

Red: It's not like I visited Sam in the hospital or something like that...

_Then..._

Red: Before we do this, let me be clear... I have business that requires further travel today, so this needs to happen quickly. You need to follow my lead. Dr. Maltz is not on the blacklist. He's an asset I need to protect.

Lizzie's morality: You want me to protect some plastic surgeon who might be linked to a terrorist organization?

Red: Are you surprised?

Abraham: And what's a beautiful young woman like you doing with this vulture?

Lizzie's morality: Trust me, it's not by choice.

Red: Back off, she's taken! So, Nathaniel Wolff... you gave him a new face. I need to find him.

Abraham: I can't tell you unless your girlfriend is with the FBI.

Lizzie: I'm with the FBI!

Abraham: Okay then: Bradley Holland. That's the name he goes under now... Bradley Holland.

Red: Abraham! I refer important clients to you, people who are vital to my business, people whose livelihood depends on your confidentiality, and you roll over like a cockapoo wanting his belly scratched? I brought Christina to you specifically for your discretion and expertise. I assured her you were trustworthy. I'm sorry! I was wrong. Shame on you, Abraham!

Abraham: No, please don't leave me! We could make this right!

Lizzie: First you call me "Molly" and now "Christina". "_That's not my name, That's not my name, That's not my name, That's not my name"_

_Later..._

Red: I finally had a chance to see her, Sam. There's a fire inside she got from you. She's volatile, unpredictable, soft then hard then... soft again. Stronger than she knows. You gave her an incredible gift, Sam. Taking her in and loving her as your own.

Sam : So you are in love with her... I ship you two!


	9. Oh no, not my sweet baby!

Episode 9:

Red: Donald! There you are! I told you I'd pick you up at the airport. The cab ride must have cost you a fortune.*hugs Donald*

Red: Donald is my best friend!

Agent Donald Ressler: I hate you so much right now!

Red: Honestly, this damn chip. What the hell do you want?

Agent Donald Ressler: Keen needs you!

Red: Really? Then why isn't she here?

Agent Donald Ressler: She's been detained.

Red: My Lizzie? Is she okay? Is she in danger? Nobody hurts my Lizzie!

Agent Donald Ressler: There's a jet on the tarmac at Munich International.

Red: My plane's faster. Don't worry, Lizzie, I will save you!

_Later..._

Red: Where's Agent Keen?

Agent Donald Ressler: I lied to you, Red. You are so whipped!

Red: Yes, I am.

_Then..._

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Keen?

Lizzie: I'm here, sir.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Have you been captured? Are you injured?

Lizzie: Neither.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Where are you?

Lizzie: Barricaded inside the armory.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Ressler and Reddington are unaccounted for, presumed down.

Lizzie: I'm gonna save you, Red! Don't worry, I'm coming!

"_Oh no, not my baby, Oh no, not my sweet baby"_

_More later..._

Lizzie: Where is everyone?

Aram Mojtabai: Captured.

Lizzie: Where's Red and Ressler?

Aram Mojtabai: I think Ressler's in bad shape.

Lizzie: I don't care about Ressler, I want to know about my Red!

Episode 10:

Anslo Garrick: Well, who might this be? Someone you know, Red?

Red: Ressler, if you don't give me the code I'm gonna make you wish you were never born!

Ressler: The access code is Romeo. This won't end very well for you...

Anslo Garrick: Bring her!

Red: She doesn't do anything for you, Anslo. She's dead weight. I don't even like her, she doesn't mean anything to me!

Anslo Garrick: Do I look like I care what you say, Red? I have to admit, I was starting to think you'd never come out of the box. But then her. She was unexpected. You both make a great couple! Old boy's still got the touch, does he? Well, whatever blows up your skirt...

Lizzie's morality: Why does everybody assumes that we're having sex? Our relationship is purely platonic!

Red's libido: For the moment...

_In the ambulance_

Red: The emissary hotel in Chicago...Mr. Kaplan.

Lizzie: Don't worry, Red, I will always find you!

_Later..._

Anslo Garrick ( is now a Lizzington shipper) The girl, the agent... I want to know who she is! You came out of the box for her. Traded your life for hers. Red Reddington placing somebody else's life ahead his own. You think I'm a fool, don't you? You love her, it's obvious! Deny it all you want, I know love when I see it! What makes her so special?

Red: You are so dead...

_On the phone..._

Red: Lizzie, my love!

Lizzie: Red, my favourite criminal! Are you ok? Where are you?

Red: Gone for a short while.

Lizzie: But I need you!

Red: I want you to know, wherever I am, whatever I'm doing, if you are in need, I will be there!

Lizzie: Even though you flirted with me from the beginning I'm gonna ask you a very dumb question: Are you my father?

Red: Excuse me?

Red's libido: Excuse me?

Red's heart: Excuse me?

Red's hat: Excuse me?

Red: No, of course I'm not your father! I love you!


	10. My boyfriend's back

Episode 11:

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Our only job right now is finding Raymond Reddington.

Lizzie: This case is important to me! It's personal. If it's personal to me, it's personal to Reddington! He's so whipped, he knows who wears the pants in our relationship! He may reach out, try to help... make this his case. I only have to say the 3 magic words: " I need you!"

_On the phone..._

Lizzzie: Hello?

Red: Lizzie, my darling...

Lizzie: Where are you? Are there any women with you?

Red: I read about that poor woman they found in Albany. Sounded awfully familiar...The Good Samaritan. Are you back on the case, I hope?

Lizzie: They're going to find you. I will find you!

Red: This one's important to you, isn't he? Why? What on Earth happened? I only ask on the chance that I may be able to help...

Lizzie: One of the earliest victims - she died in my arms. There was nothing I could do to stop it. So you better come back to me! I miss you!

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: I think I've got something.

Agent Donald Ressler: You've spoken with your boyfriend?

Lizzie: Yes. He called. He sends you his love!

Agent Meera Malik: He called? When? Did you tell Cooper?

Lizzie's morality: Not yet. We talked about the case.

Agent Donald Ressler: Yeah, sure... I believe you!

Agent Meera Malik : He called, and you didn't report it? You were right, Donald, she's got it bad!

Lizzie: It's not true!

Agent Donald Ressler and Agent Meera Malik: " _Who d'you think you're kiddin'? He's the earth and heaven to you, Try to keep it hidden, Honey, we can see right through you, Girl, you can't conceal it, We know how you feel, And who you're thinking of"_

_Then:_

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: I want to know whose name is on what account and where that money came from. I'm counting on your discretion!

Agent Meera Malik: I think you should know Reddington reached out to his girfriend, Agent Keen.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: And said what exactly? I need to know!

Agent Meera Malik: She won't say.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: It's clear now, they are secretly engaged!

_More later..._

Lizzie: I don't want to fight, Tom! Let's just talk. I need to remember why I'm still married to you...

Red: Tom's at the airport. " _Girl it's just the two of us, 'Cause I'm thinking about you day and night, And I just can't get you off my mind, When you get a minute baby I was thinking we could hook up, It's just the two of us, the two of us"_

Lizzie:"_My boyfriend's back and you're gonna get in trouble (Hey la, hey la, my boyfriend's back) You see him comin' you better head out on the double (Hey la, hey la, my boyfriend's back)"_

Lizzie's morality: What the hell are you doing here? You know what you did to me? I've missed you!

Red: How did things go with your case? Congratulations! I'm proud of you!

Lizzie: Does this mean you're back? Please say yes, please say yes!

Red: I don't know...

Lizzie: What do you mean you don't know? I need you!

Red: We're back where we began... me speaking with you.

Lizzie: Speaking? More like flirting! What's the matter with you? Are you playing hard to get? Because I don't like it...

Lizzie: Did you bring me anything? A diamond ring, perhaps...

Red: Yes. The next name on the blacklist.

Lizzie(disappointed): Should I be happy or something?

**A/N: **I'm sorry this took so long! I had a busy week... Hope you like it!

Nameturkeyl- Thank you very much for your review! I also want this to happen on the screen!


	11. Maybe I have a little crush on him

Episode 12:

Red: There's someone I think you should find... He's a man who protects the guilty by preying on the innocent. He's killed women, children, infants if need be.* he approached her *

Lizzie's morality: Why does he come near me? I cannot allow to lose focus!

Red: Whatever the particular job calls for...

Lizzie's morality: I can't even concentrate on his words.

Lizzie: I've really missed him!

Lizzie's morality: Conceal, don't feel, don't let him see! I do not find him that attractive or charming or amazing!

_Later..._

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Reddington said these people were going to disappear. Now, they're burned beyond recognition. What's his explanation?

Lizzie: He hasn't given me one, sir.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: So call him! Get him in here!

Lizzie: He'll only meet off-site. He doesn't think the mole hunt ends with Newton Phillips. Reddington believes that there's someone on the inside.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: I think he just wants to be with you away from prying eyes. If this crash is not an accident, then I want to know what it is. So, meet with your fiance. Get him to talk. It should be easy.

_Then..._

Lizzie: I think I was followed.

Red: _" __I I follow, I follow you deep sea baby, I follow you, I I follow, I follow you, dark boom honey, I follow you"_

Lizzie's morality: Is this really necessary?

Red: Yes. It's a sanctuary. I'm planning to marry you in this church.

Lizzie's morality: You were wrong about Madrczyk. You said the Alchemist was hired to protect him. Now he's dead.

Red: Pytor Madrczyk is alive.

Lizzie's morality: No, he's dead.

Red: He's alive!

Lizzie: No, he isn't! Okay, maybe you're right...

Lizzie's morality: Are you telling me you know where he wanted to flee?

Red: If I tell you... you have to promise me you'll try the fertilized duck eggs. It's a daring and unique dining experience. You'll think you've died and gone to hell.

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: How does he do it?

Red: I don't know even half of it. I've heard rumors. Removing white blood cells from a victim and replacing them with the red blood cells of his client. Leaving cloned DNA at crime scenes to mislead the police. Even incorporating synthetic DNA into genuine human tissue.

Lizzie's morality: Don't stare at his lips, don't stare at his lips! Oh, no, it's to late!

_Then..._

Red: Lizzie! Come, look at this. The boys have come up with a remarkable little game. I really don't understand how any of it works, but I just love that...smell the machines make.

Red's hat: Hello, Lizzie! I've missed you quite terribly!

Red's libido: She is wearing red... That's a nice outfit, I bet it would look even better in a pile on my bedroom floor.

Lizzie: * stares at his lips*

Lizzie's morality: Okay, maybe I have a little crush on him... it's no big deal!

Red: What do you know about the man, specifically? What is it that makes him unique?

Lizzie: He's, uh... a scientist. An expert in DNA.

Red: That's what he does. Who is he?

Lizzie: He's nobody. A lab rat.

Red: That's my girl(friend)!

Lizzie: He's a lab rat!

_On the phone..._

Red: Just out of curiosity, what number am I on your speed dial?

Lizzie: Seven.

Red:*offended* I should be your number 1! Who's six?

Lizzie: Chinese takeout. Can we come back to this later? I need your help!

_More later..._

Red: The Alchemist...you found him!

Lizzie's morality: Yes. And you were right about the people he helped disappear. Some of them we don't even know. Cooper thought you might be able... You didn't even look at it.

Red: I have other business.

Lizzie's morality: That's what this was about. Sending us to find the Alchemist for you. So you could have that list. Who is it that you're looking for?

Red: I'd love to talk, Lizzie, but as I said I have unfinished business to attend to.

Lizzie:*rejected* "_Why you gotta be so mean?"_


	12. My big bad handsome man

Episode 13:

Red: There's nothing more profound and of lasting consequence than the decision to have a child. The exploitation and perversion of that decision is the stock and trade of a truly evil organization- the Cyprus Adoption Agency.

Lizzie's morality: Wait...what? Seriously? Adoption? You want me to believe this is a coincidence? Tom and I are adopting a baby, and you serve up an adoption agency?

Red: You want to adopt a baby with Tom? I feel sorry for that baby...

Lizzie: Hey, that was rude! Tom is a wonderful and loving husband... *one eternity later* and I think he is perfect for me.

Red:*triple facepalm* No comment...

_Later..._

Red's hat: Hello, beautiful! I see that you are wearing red again!

Lizzie: I think this will be my last case for awhile. I'm gonna spend some time at home, be with the baby.

Red: Oh, God! Please no!

Lizzie's morality: We compared the DNA to every known sample on file for missing or abducted kids-not a single hit. The Cyprus Agency delivered 27 children, all unaccounted for. Nobody's ever reported them missing.

Red: You're so linear!

Lizzie:*offended* What's that supposed to mean?

Red: Lizzie, not every missing child is on the back of a milk carton. Run the DNA again. This time, don't look for an exact match. Look at the relatives. You want to find where those kids came from, that's how.

Lizzie:*walks away*

Red's libido: She certainly looks good walking away from me.

Red's heart: Please don't go away! _"Don't you want me, baby_

_Don't you want me, oh"_

Red: You're arriving at a point of no return, Lizzie. If you have any doubts about your husband ( he is shady), you can't go through with this adoption( please don't adopt a baby!) When you get there, if there is even one shred of doubt-

Lizzie: There isn't. Why would you say that? I love my husband, he is amazing!

_Then..._

Lizzie: *smiles* Here comes my big bad handsome man!

Red: Sorry I'm late!

Lizzie's morality: Quick! Pretend that you are not enjoying yourself and that you have important business to discus!

Lizzie: What the hell is this place? What are we doing here? I told you- I need help tracking hydroxipam. There's no federal prescription database. I can't subpoena every pharmacy on the East Coast.

Red: You don't have to. *touches her arm* Now, be polite. You're about to meet one of the nicest narcotics dealers this side of Cleveland.

Red: Russell!

Russell:Red! What's up, fool?

Red: Last time I played around with that, I ended up naked in the desert trying to hitch a ride to Tuba City.

Lizzie: You were naked in the desert? When was this? I'm just curious...It's not like I imagine you naked! In the desert...*dreamy face*

Russell: She seems like a cop. Is she your girlfriend or something?

Red: Not yet...

Lizzie's morality: Yeah, that's gonna happen!

_More later..._

Lizzie: I can't do it!

Tom-shady as fuck-Keen: Do what? You're not ready...

Lizzie: We're not ready. Tom... it's us. I can't have a baby right now! It's not like I was influenced by the conversation I had with Red... Honey, you can't tell me that there's not one shred of doubt, one shred that wonders if this is... broken. You are not my boyfriend anymore!

**A/N**: I'm so sorry about the wait for this chapter!


	13. Is this the real life?

Episode 14 ( aka "Everything is Lizzington and nothing hurts")

Red: She's breathtakingly unattractive, but she's worth over $40 million. The only Vermeer in private hands.

Lizzie: That's considered a masterpiece? Seriously?

Red: Last night, I got up for a scoop of orange sherbet and she caught my eye. I just stood here in the dark squinting at her. Poor thing ruined my appetite. Even after I went back to bed, all I could hear was the hideous music she must be playing. Didn't sleep a wink.

Red: Your country has become a nation of eavesdroppers. Frequency domains, triangulation, satellites, crypt-o-whatever. You've forgotten that what matters most is human intelligence. Alliances, relationships, seduction. Madeline Pratt is a master at...

Lizzie: *jealousy mode activated* Madeline Pratt? Madeline Pratt...

Red: Is a thief. And a woman of singular talents.

Lizzie: And let me guess: she is one of your ex-girlfriends! And now you want something of hers and you expect the FBI to help you get it.

Red: Jealousy looks good on you!

Lizzie's morality: Jealous? Me? Why will I be jealous?

Red: No reason, sure….. I believe you!

_Later….._

Red: This is the Madeline Pratt you all know and love. Politically active. Influential. A good citizen. What you don't know is the Madeline Pratt I love.

Lizzie: Wait…. You love her? Not that I care or something…..

Red: Six million in diamonds stolen from a de beers outpost in the Congo. Security fibers used in printing the Czech koruna taken from a mint in Prague and used to produce counterfeit banknotes. The Madeline Pratt you know fosters relationships with incredibly powerful people. The one you don't, exploits those relationships in ways that impact national security.

Lizzie:*lovestruck*: He looks so good when he talks like this! I'm gonna stare at him forever….. "_Oh baby when you talk like that, You make a woman go mad, So be wise and keep on, Reading the signs of my body"_

Red: Thieving is not my strongest suit. Luckily, we have an ace of spades among us. Isn't that right, agent Keen? You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room.

Lizzie: Oh, no, he knows!

Lizzie's morality: Deny everything!

_Then…_

Madeline: I need to know about you. How you respond under pressure. This is an embassy. Security, cameras, armed guards everywhere. One mistake and you go to prison.

Lizzie: Oh, you're the ex? Nice to meet you, I'm the up-grade!

Red: Nicole here is as calm as a Hindu cow. Tell her that story about Frank.

Lizzie: I was 17. There was a drug store. Thursday night, they made bank deposits on Friday. I was the look out. Night manager came back. He forgot his glasses. I gave the signal, but nothing. I'd convinced myself that Frank was the only thing I had in the world, so the night manager was an easy decision. I seduced him into the alley.

Red's libido: I wish I was that manager!

_Later….._

Red: Wow! " _I've never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight,_

_I've never seen you shine so bright_"

Lizzie: What are you wearing?

Red: A tuxedo. I'm your plus one!

Lizzie: I'm going onto foreign soil to steal a priceless artifact, with no back up.

Red: You have me! And I'm not going to let anything happen to you!

Lizzie's morality: It's hard not to fall in love with you when you say things like this!

_On the dance floor_

Red: Shall we?

Lizzie: You can do this, Lizzie! It's not so hard…

Red: Lizzie, I know this must be very difficult for you, but we can't both lead. There's only one rule... pick a partner who knows what he's doing.

Red: "_I never really knew that she could dance like this, _

_She makes a man wants to speak Spanish,_

_Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa"_

Lizzie: How did you know about Omaha?

Red: I didn't. It was a heartwarming story…..the night manager and the alley.

Lizzie's morality: I made it up.

Red: You're not a cop tonight, you're a criminal.

Lizzington shippers: "Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?"

Anslo Garrick in the afterlife: My OTP!

_More later…._

Lizzie: _" I need a hero, I'm holding on for a hero 'til the end of the night, He's gotta be strong, And he's gotta be fast, And he's gotta be fresh from the fight"_

Red: There you are. What the hell happened to you?

Gaymond Reddington aka Sassy Gay Friend: What what what are you doing? You just leave me stranded with that awful Algerian. He's been hitting on me for 20 minutes.

The guard: Sir, this is a secure area!

Lizzie: What the fuck is going on? Please explain!

Gaymond: The things I do for this one. Gallivanting around the globe for your little assignations with you know…Carrying her furs and bikinis as if I wouldn't rather be back in Dutchess county with my shulties. Look at your life, look at your choices! Do you have any idea whose horn this tramp is blowing?

Lizzie: *offended* Excuse me?

Lizzie's morality: Excuse me?

Red:* saves Lizzie*


	14. Do you really want to hurt me?

Episode 15:

Red: Lizzie, my love, there you are! Have you seen the paper?

Red's hat: "_I feel pretty, Oh so pretty_"

Lizzie: What about it? I still remember that wonderful dance that we've shared…..*dreamy eyes*

Red: Mark Hastings, US Attorney from Maryland - 12 years ago, he indicted the head of the Reynoso cartel. A week later, he went missing.

Lizzie: I remember. The Bureau assumed it was a retribution killing.

Lizzington shippers: Hey, you two should kiss!

Re: I believe he was held captive, but not by the Reynoso cartel. But if what I believe about Hastings is true, if he has been held captive all these years, then it would confirm that the myth is true - The Judge is real.

Lizzie:* stares at his lips* OMG…those lips!

Lizzie's morality: Just focus, Lizzie! The Judge? " _I gotta, Get my, get my head in the game, You gotta, Get you, get you, get you, get you head in the game" _

Red: Every culture has a justice myth, an avenging angel who exacts retribution for the weak and innocent.

Lizzie's morality: Try to imagine him in his underwear. Oh no, he's hot!

_On the phone…_

Lizzie: Cooper's been taken.

Red: By whom?

Lizzie: The Judge, we think, as retribution for Rifkin's execution.

Red: If you ever want to see Cooper again, you need to get Hastings to talk. Lizzie, I must be going.

Lizzie: Wait. Did you hear me? Rifkin was executed - an eye for an eye. Cooper is going to die. I need your help!

Red: Dembe, you better tell Edward there's gonna be a change in flight plan. I need to help my wifey!

Episode 16:

Red: Christina, I don't care about production issues. Please... just figure it out by the 22nd. I gotta go now, my girlfriend just came to visit me.

Lizzie's morality: Ressler... where is he? I know he came to you. I know you told him about that hospital.

Red: Do we really have to talk about Agent Ressler? He came to me for assistance, which I provided. My little baby, off to destroy people….

Lizzie's morality: He's not like you. He can't just murder someone in cold blood and come out of it okay on the other end.

Red's heart:"_Do you really want to hurt me , Do you really want to make me cry"_

Red: Nobody can murder someone in cold blood and come out okay on the other end. Do you remember that time when we had more than one scene together and you didn't insult me? Yeah, me neither.

Lizzie: I'm sorry….

Red: Our scene lasted for only 56 seconds! I counted! This is outrageous!


	15. We will have a spring wedding!

Episode 17

Red: Is everything all right?

Lizzie: Yeah, fine. "_I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, And I'll punch the man who says I'm not_."

Lizzie's morality: What am I looking at?

Red: A car accident. Killed the driver, Nathan Platt.

Lizzie's morality: And why am I looking at it?

Red's libido: Because this is my excuse to be closer to you. I see that you are wearing red again...We are meant to be together!

Red: We will have a spring wedding!

Lizzie: Slow down, Romeo! Who said anything about a wedding? Last time I checked I was still married!

Red: Yeah, but you didn't say "happily married."

_Later…_

Lizzie: Have you ever seen this woman?

Red: *poker face* Hand me that piece right there.

Lizzie: Her name is Jolene Parker. She was a sub at Tom's school. But as of yesterday morning, she's a missing person. I found high end surveillance gear, a cache of documents, burner cells.

Red: Was there any evidence connecting any of this to me? I'm just asking, I never saw this woman in my life!( #not guilty of anything)

Lizzie's morality: No. I don't need evidence to connect this to you. Jolene Parker is in my life because of you. None of this happened until you arrived on my doorstep. My life was great, my marriage, Tom... Thank God I have Tom, because with you I never know what to believe!

Red: I have never lied to you!

_Then….._

Lizzie: About that wedding…You were right!

Lizzington shippers: "_Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah"_

Red: Come in.

Red's heart: It's about bloody time!

Lizzie: What's this?

Red: It's a 1940's Sorrento music box.

Lizzie: I know this song! When I was a little girl, I had these terrible nightmares. I remember flashes of...fire and smoke. You spent days building that damn thing. It's the most romantic thing that someone ever done for me! You knew about the song. You knew I'd find out the truth. And you wanted me...

Red:*hugs her* To know that everything is going to be okay! *kisses her hair* You're going to be okay!

Lizzington shippers: *dead_* "Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy_?"


	16. Met my new boyfriend, Raymond Reddington

Episode 18

Red: I come bearing gifts: Pimento cheese sandwiches. Toasted, with the crusts cut off. Eartha Kitt's recipe, it's a fantastic story.

Lizzie: That's so sweet! Tom only made me pancakes…I hate pancakes!

Lizzie's morality:*ponytail power* What do you know about Tom?

Red: Do we really have to talk about him? I thought we were having a moment…..

Lizzie: You've been threatening to tell me the truth about my husband since the day we met, and I'm ready to listen. What do you know?

Red: Several years ago, it came to my attention that somebody was meddling in my business. To protect myself and my interests I inventoried my vulnerabilities.

Lizzie: Me.

Red's heart: Of course."_I love you baby_"

Red's libido: " _And if it's quite all right, I need you baby, To warm my lonely night"._

Red's hat:"_I love you baby, Trust in me when I say_"

_On the phone…_

Red: How is your case developing, Lizzie?

Lizzie's morality: We have one of the assassins in custody. We're taking him in for questioning now. Where are we with Craig?

Red: Is he still in town? Because I think it's time for the three of us to have a little chat.

_Later…_

Lizzie's morality: Hey, Craig. Can we talk? Who do you work for?

Craig Keen: I don't know what you're talking about!

Lizzie's morality: I know who you are. I know about the time you did at Wasco. I know about the warrants. I know about you, Christopher Maly!

Christopher Maly:"_Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit_" You have no idea who you're dealing with!

Lizzie: I never did like you!

Christopher Maly: You didn't exactly think this through, did you?

Lizzie: Actually, I did. Craig, met my new boyfriend, Raymond Reddington.

Red: Looks like we're a little late to the party. You must be the brother-in-law. Was he mean to you, darling?

Lizzie: He isn't cooperating.

Red: Dembe, get the hacksaw. We're gonna have to take him out of here in pieces.

_Then…_

Lizzie: Honey, I'm home! Did you do the dishes like I asked you?

Red: No, I didn't have time. Shh, you need to watch this!

Lizzie: What are you, 12? Men…

Red: Unlike someone who shall remain nameless, we waited for you. Shall we get started?

Red: Tell me about Berlin!

Christopher Maly: I can't.

Red: What's in Berlin? Is the bank in Berlin? Christopher, who is in Berlin? Dembe, we're moving this conversation now.

Christopher Maly: #YOLO

Red: Okay, then.

Lizzie's morality: What now? What are you doing?

Red: Putting on my coat.

Lizzie's morality: A man just jumped through the window! There's a body on the sidewalk!

Red: Yes. And your husband, the police and all the king's men will be here soon. If you care to stick around and explain, feel free, but I for one will not be in attendance. See you later, alligator!

_More later…_

Lizzie's morality: I can't do this anymore! Can't look at him, let alone touch him.

Red: Be patient. With Craig, things have been set in motion. How Tom reacts will tell us a great deal. You need to stay the course.

Lizzie's morality: I don't think I can. (*looking at his ass*) What is it? What does it mean?

Red: I don't know yet. Were you just checking out my ass?

Lizzie's morality: No, of course not!


	17. I came out to have a good time and I

Hi!

Thank you so much for all the sweet reviews! Sorry for the delay, I will try to update sooner!

* * *

Episode 19

Lizzie: Tom knows something's off.

Red: What makes you say that?

Lizzie: I can feel it! I know him.

Red: Are you sure? Because it took me many months to convince you that he was a douchebag. I don't think you know him at all!

Lizzie: My profiler sense is tingling!

Red: Tom is not the reason I'm here *he approached her*

Lizzie:*dreamy eyes* Are you going to propose?

Lizzie's morality: Don't get your hopes up, though. This doesn't mean that I will say yes.

Red: The Pavlovich brothers are back in town.

Lizzie:*disappointed* I didn't expect that.

_On the phone….._

Red: Where are you?

Lizzie's morality: I'm busy!

Red: Your husband is not in school.

Lizzie: Wait. What? Where is he?

Red: Meet me at 9th and Constitution.

Lizzie: Reddington says he has a lead on the brothers. Wants to talk. Let me know what NTSB says about that downed aircraft!

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Are you sure that he just wants to talk?

Agent Donald Ressler: Talk? Is that what you kids are calling it these days?

Agent Meera Malik: These two are practically married!

_Later….._

Red: Tom called in sick this morning. He returned home briefly before making a stop at the Radford Bank in Adams Morgan. He's made three phone calls, all from pay phones. He's been sitting at that cart for nearly an hour. I'm sorry, Lizzie!

Lizzie: Don't be.

Red: This must be difficult….

Lizzie: You want to know what's hard? Sitting here when all I really want to do is get my hands around his throat!

Red's libido: I will love to see that!

Red's heart: After you kill him we must run away to Argentina!

_Then…_

Tom-shady as fuck-Keen("_Here he is, the Biggest Douche of the Universe! In all the galaxies, there's no bigger douche than you! You've reached the top, the pinnacle of douchedom! Good going, douche. Your dreams have come true!") _What is his obsession with you? You guys got like a daddy-daughter thing going on?

Lizzie: Excuse me?

Lizzie's morality: Excuse me?

Tom-shady as fuck-Keen: What's your plan? Is daddy coming over? Is he gonna make me talk?

Lizzie: No, he's not my daddy, he is my boyfriend! We are planning a spring wedding and you're not invited!

_Later…_

Lizzie: How is this all gonna end?

Red's hat: Please don't be sad! Red's gonna make it alright!

Red: This is an end. And then something new will begin. You deserve the best in life, Lizzie! I know that sounds odd coming from a man who has brought you some of the worst, but it's the reason why Tom had to work so hard to be that for you... Because you deserve that! And it will come….. " _'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars, I'm gonna give you my heart_"

Episode 20

Agent Donald Ressler: St. Adrian's Hospital? This is where your father died.

Lizzie: It's the same building. I checked like four times.

Agent Donald Ressler: Where did you get this? At least tell me this: do you trust the source?

Lizzie: No.

Agent Donald Ressler: Doesn't prove Reddington was there the day Sam died. Please don't break up, we're all rooting for you two!

Lizzie's morality: If Reddington did fly all the way to Nebraska just to talk to my dad before he died, there must have been something he wanted.

Agent Donald Ressler: Well, is it possible they were friends, he was just

paying his respects?

Lizzie's morality: Since when does Reddington have friends?

Agent Donald Ressler:*offended* That's not true! I am his best friend! He gave me a box with my enemy's head. That's true friendship! "_Why you gotta be so rude_?"

_Then…_

Lizzie's morality: You think he did this?

Red: Some freshman politician is suddenly thrust into the spotlight, his selfless heroism on full display. I suspect Assemblyman Patrick Chandler's poll numbers are about to go through the roof. * he comes to sit next to Lizzie on the couch*

Lizzie: Are you planning to seduce me here? Because it will work….

Red's libido: If I asked you to go to bed with me, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?

Dembe: Get a room you two!

Lizzie's morality: I just watched a man give CPR to his dying wife and you're telling me it was a media stunt?

Red: Yes. Go out to the bridge. Perhaps you can figure out why there aren't any tire marks.

_Later…._

Red: The owner will make his rounds soon enough.

Lizzie: My father died of lung cancer.

Red: Forgive me! Should we go?

Lizzie: No. Let's wait for the owner.

Red:*smokes a cigar*

Lizzie: Damn….

Lizzie's morality: Conceal, don't feel, don't let him see! I know you can do this, Lizzie, ignore the sexual tension!

Lizzie: You once said the reason you were here was because of my father.

Red: What's this about, Lizzie?

Lizzie: Did the two of you know each other? Don't tell me you were friends. You don't have any friends, nobody likes you!

Red:*offended* You are right…Dembe is not my best friend, he is my brother! I knew your father, and he knew me.

Lizzie: Is that why you were in his hospital room the day he died? I talked to you on the phone that day. You never mentioned you were there.

Red:*busted* No, I didn't. I don't like where this is going!

Lizzie: How did you know each other? Why were you there?

Charles: Good to see you again, my friend!

Red: Ah, bless you, Charles! You are my friend. Take that, Lizzie!

" _Motherfucker I'm awesome! No you're not dude, don't lie, I'm awesome!" _

_More later…_

Lizzie: Were you in the hospital room when he died? Did you kill my father?

Red:"_Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit_" Yes.

Red's heart: Not again! This is gonna hurt so bad!

Lizzie: I was right! There was something he wanted to tell me before he died and you didn't want me to know.

Red: Babe, I know how this looks but I can explain!

Lizzie: Go to hell!

Red:" _And who do you think you are? Running around leaving scars, Collecting a jar of hearts, Tearing love apart"_ I don't expect you to understand.

Lizzie:*Hulk rage* Understand?! How could I possibly understand when you take someone I love away from me and then try to justify it?!

Red: Listen to me! I've been friends with Sam for all of yours and most of my life. He was dying. Every part of his body was failing. He was impatient for it to end. He'd asked to be disconnected from all the machines. He was in pain...and suffering. And he wasn't thinking clearly. If he were, he would never have chosen to tell you any of it. It wasn't his choice to make. We said goodbye... and I put him out of his misery.

Lizzie: We're done, I'm done! This ends right now. God, you're a monster!

Red: I came out to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now!


	18. The proposal

Episode 21

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: What's this?

Lizzie's morality: My letter of resignation.

Red: Hello, Agent Keen.

Lizzie's morality: As of today, I'm requesting an immediate transfer out of the task force.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Look, Agent Keen, I know that you two broke up, but….

Lizzie's morality: I've made up my mind.

Red: I have an urgent case.

Lizzie's morality: He'll have to tell it to someone else.

Red: That's not going to work.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Agent Keen...

Lizzie's morality: He killed my father! Reddington went into my father's hospital room when he was alive. And when Reddington came out, my father was dead.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: You are never getting laid again, Reddington!

Red's libido: What? Never?

Lizzie's morality: Sir, please accept my resignation!

Red: Agent Keen, are you really willing to put your anger at me above the lives of innocent people?

Lizzie's morality: I'll do the case. But when it's over, I'm finished! Understood? I'm done! "_Ooh, we called it off again last night, But ooh, this time I'm telling you, I'm telling you, We are never ever ever getting back together, We are never ever ever getting back together_"

_Later…_

Red: You realize if you leave, the task force ends. Everyone's lives go back to normal, except yours.

Lizzie's morality: This doctor friend of yours... tell me about him.

Red: He was the lead research scientist on infectious diseases at USAMRIID and the foremost expert on the Cullen virus. This is a copy of Tom's code book. It was used to pass information between Tom and his superiors. There's surprisingly little about myself and my organization, but it contains speculation about our cases and a great deal about you.

Lizzie: Dembe, do you mind trading seats with me?

Dembe:*awkward* I know that feel, bro!

Red: _"Don't, don't you want me? You know I don't believe you, When you say that you don't need m_e"

Red's heart: I'm fine! Totally fine…

_Then…_

Lizzie: "Space Agent UD-4126" How stupid do you think I am?

Red: Not the slightest.

Lizzie: He's a patient in a mental facility. This little field trip had nothing to do with trying to solve the case and everything to do with you getting me alone in that plane so you could try to change my mind!

Red's libido: Is it working?

Lizzie's morality: Have you ever had a selfless moment in your entire life? One where you weren't trying to think of some angle you could play or advantage you could gain? My God, it's amazing! If you expect me to forgive you...

Red: Yeah, because it's not like I have came out of the box for you and I traded my life for yours. What are you doing?

Lizzie: Catching a cab to the airport. I'm flying back on my own.

_Later…_

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: You know what happens if you go through with your resignation. They'll take him, Reddington disappears. He'll never go to trial, he won't be in jail. He'll be shoved in a box and interrogated the rest of his life. And knowing Reddington, that won't be long.

Lizzie: This isn't about my husband or even what Reddington did to my father. This is... all of it. It's too much! I'm not strong enough!

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: You are. And I'm not saying this just because I want to see you two getting back together.

_More later…_

Lizzie: I need you to come with me!

Red: Where?

Lizzie: You need to get in the car now! I made a mistake but I'm not gonna let them take you away from me! _"Oh no, not my baby, Oh no, not my sweet baby"_

Red: Lizzie, what have you done?

Lizzie's morality: They voided your agreement. The deal... it's off. You don't have immunity.

Red: And you set this meeting so they could take me.

Lizzie: We need to leave!

Red: This mistake... I'd like to hear more about it.

Dembe: Raymond, we have to go!

Red: Not until I hear from Agent Keen. You should wait in the vehicle, Dembe.

Lizzie: Are you crazy?

Red: Yes, I'm crazy about you! "_Got me lookin so crazy right now, Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now"_

Lizzie: There's no time. Do you want to run away with me? Or do you want to spend the rest of your life in solitary confinement? The full force of the FBI is coming for you.

Red: They're already here, Lizzie! What are they gonna do to me that hasn't been done before? Kill me? None of it is worse than losing you!

Lizzie: I think my heart just melted!

Red: Please excuse the gun. I'd hate for them to think we're in cahoots.

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: You don't get out of this. Drop the weapon now! There's no way you're out of here! You're surrounded!

Lizzie's morality: If this is another one of your games to try to trick me into forgiving you for Sam, for what you've done... You have ruined my life! And I swear to God, right now, I want to kill you! But there are answers I need, and I can't get them without you.

Red: And I can't get them without you.

Lizzie's morality: So I guess we're stuck with each other.

Red: Every love story started with this. " _You can try to push me from you, Nothing you do can pull us apart, 'Cause it's too late, there's no escape, might as well face it, Baby, we're stuck with each other, stuck with each other, Ain't nothin' you can do 'bout it"_

Red:*he bends down on one knee* Agent Keen, will you marry me?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Please say yes!

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: Arrest him!

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Why you gotta be so cruel?

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: My OTP is Keenler!

Red: That explains a lot….


	19. She ain't perfect, but she's worth it

Episode 22

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: The girl, Agent Keen, was she worth all this? Getting captured?

Red: "_Fuck you, Fuck you very, very much!"_ That stuff you use in your hair: is that Brylcreem? My father used Brylcreem.

Red's heart: Yes!

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: "Yes" what?

Red: The girl…. she's worth it! " _She ain't perfect, but she's worth it, Every breath I breathe, for the life of me, And I know I might not deserve it, But she loves me, and it's simply amazing"_

_Later..._

Lizzie's morality: It's vital I speak to him!

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: Yeah, that's not gonna happen.

Lizzie's morality: He could help us.

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: The business with Reddington holding a gun on you didn't fool me. You nearly accepted his proposal !

Lizzie's morality: I wasn't going to say yes… I swear!

Lizzie: Actually, I was going to accept his proposal. You can't say no to that face!

Lizzie's morality: He killed my father! But this man we're hunting, Berlin, he's somehow in the center of all this, and my only objective is finding him. Reddington can help us.

_On the phone…_

Red: Lizzie, you in danger, girl! Everyone on the task force is a target.

Lizzie: What are you talking about? Where are you? I want to see you!

Red: There'll be time to explain later. For now, pull everyone back.

_Then…_

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: Where are you on the case?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: We've got the plane's manifest. Unfortunately, our POI's not on it.

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: So you're nowhere?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: We're piecing it together.

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: The good news is that Reddington's escape from federal custody has been contained, which means if Keen is willing, the task force can continue.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: You arrested Reddington, he escaped. Now you ask me to meet in secret, off the record, so you can tell me that you want Reddington to work again with Agent Keen? You know what that means …Are you now a Lizzington shipper?

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: No, I'm not. But many people ship them.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: What people?

Special Agent Walter Gary Martin: Just get these two idiots back together! It shouldn't be too hard…

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: What people?

_In the car…_

Lizzie: They don't know if Cooper's gonna make it through the night. You still haven't told me how Sam was involved in this!

Red: The way Sam told the story... was that one night, an old friend showed up at his door scared. The friend told Sam he was leaving town, that he was in danger and that he needed someone to care for a little girl that her father had died that night in a fire. So Sam took the little girl in, and he raised her as his own, always sheltering her from the truth about her biological father.

Lizzie: And that's why you killed him.

Red: I killed Sam because he was in pain and he wanted to die and because I had to protect you from the truth. "_I'll protect you forever my love, I'll protect you, I only have you, I love you, I'll hug you more, I'm yours, I'm yours, Even if you push me, push me, push me, push me away, I love you, I'll hug you more, I'm yours, I'm yours"_

Lizzie: What truth? The only memory I have of my real father is from the night of the fire. I remember him pulling me out of the flames, saving me.

Red: That wan't your father, that was me! I've saved you! I loved Sam, Lizzie. Taking his life was...of all the difficult things that I've done, that may... may be the most. But I did it to keep you from learning the name of your real father, to protect you! And you must understand, having done that, I'm certainly not going to tell you who he was now!

_Later…_

Red: I have not a clue what I've done to you, what I've taken from you! And yet, of all the people I've hurt, none of them have come after me with half as much vim and vigor as you. I don't even recognize your face! I'm stymied. And yet, here we are. You found me.

Milos Pavel Kinsky: Through your weakness. I searched for one for years, a weakness that would allow me to get to you. I nearly gave up. And then I find out about her. Seemed so implausible that someone so careful could be so careless! And so I exploited it and waited. And here we are... thanks to Elizabeth Keen!

Red: Your dead will be slow and painful! I guess this is the night bitches die.

Tom: Slide it! Slide the gun now.

Red: No! Lizzie, my love, are you hurt?

Lizzie: No.

Milos Pavel Kinsky: Do it! Kill her! Pull the trigger! Do it! Now!

Red:*kills Milos* Well, that simplifies matters. Just the three of us. Tom, put the gun down before you do something you'll deeply regret! I'm the one you want! "_I know you want me, want me"_ Make the right choice, Tom! But make it fast, because when I get over there, I'm gonna take that gun away from you!

Lizzie:*shoots Tom* No!

Red: We can't leave him alive.

Lizzie: Please go. I'll finish it. This is between us.

Red: Do it quickly. I'll be waiting outside. I can't wait to run away to Argentina with you!

Tom: I'm sorry.

Lizzie: What?

Tom:*he whispered in her ear* I'm in love with Reddington!

_More later…_

Red: Lizzie, there's something I want you to understand about your father, Sam. That night when he took you in without hesitation, Sam made a difficult choice that changed the course of his life. And that's where you find yourself now. You can turn away and run from it. You can hide from it. And if you choose to do that, I'll fly away. Or you can face it and confront it... engage it.

Red's heart: Engage….engagement, I love this words!

Lizzie: No.

Red: I understand. I'll be on a plane tonight, me and my broken heart. _"All I need's a little love in my life, All I need's a little love in the dark, A little but I'm hoping it might kick start, Me and my broken heart"_

Red's heart: _" Goodbye my lover, Goodbye my friend, You have been the one, You have been the one for me."_

*twelve seconds later*

Lizzie: Surprise, bitch! I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.

Red: _" And I... will always love you, I will always love you, I will always love you, I will always love you"_

A/N: Thank you very much for all your support! This is the last chapter, unless you want me to continue with season 2.


	20. Season 2

A/N: Hi! Thank you so much for all the sweet reviews!

* * *

Season 2

Episode 1

Lizzie:"_Guess who's back, back again, Shady's back, tell a friend, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back"_

Red: Here comes my wifey! Did you take a different route?

Lizzie's morality: Justice is freaking out.

Red: Change your hotel?

Lizzie: Hellfire missiles? Seriously? I'm trying to protect you and what do you do?!

Red: Life is far too Important a thing ever to talk seriously about. People love to decry Big brother, the NSA, the government listening in on their most private lives, yet they all willingly go online and hand over the most intimate details of those lives to big data.

Lizzie: Most people don't care that Google knows their search history.

Red: Oh, I think you care. I know that you search pictures with James Spader in your free time. Don't worry, your secret is safe with me.

Lizzie: *heavy breathing*

_On the phone….._

Lizzie: What the hell is going on? Martin said you were extracted by Mossad. I can't leave you 2 minutes alone because you're always getting into trouble!

Red: We'll discuss it later. What am I looking at?

Lizzie: Targets. Turns out Berlin didn't contract Lord Baltimore to find you. He's looking for a woman.

Red: What woman?

Lizzie: We're not sure. We only know her profile. Aram was able to narrow the search, but that still leaves us with over 200 potential targets.

Red: Naomi Hyland.

Lizzie: Who? Who the hell is Naomi Hyland?

Red: *dramatic pause* She was my wife.

Lizzie: What?! And why didn't you tell me about her?

Red: Honey, I know how this looks like, but you're my only lady! "_Relight my fire, your love is my only desire, Relight my fire cos I need your love"_

_Later….._

Lizzie's morality: Mrs. Hyland, it's important we move quickly.

Naomi: You think I'm gonna run, just walk away and start over again? 'Cause you and I both know that's where this is going. I'm... I'm not going anywhere! I had a life, you know? My daughter had a life with a house and a dog. And then I woke up one day... You can't imagine what it's like to have a man like Raymond Reddington turn your life upside down.

Lizzie: Really? Because I have a pretty good idea about how it's like to meet and fall in love with Raymond "Red" Reddington. I guess you're not invited to our wedding!

Naomi: They accused me of being a part of it. Somehow, I was a suspect. Put my life under a-a microscope... every call, e-every charge. My assets were... I finally convinced them I was innocent. They said I had to go, give up everything. I remember it was a Wednesday afternoon. My daughter wasn't even out of school yet. And by Thursday, we were in Philadelphia, fending for ourselves.

Lizzie: Please, tell me everything! Overshare! Leave nothing out….

Episode 2

Red: Lizzie! I'd like to introduce you to my manicurist, Rosa Heredia. She's the one I was telling you about, who was dating that nine-fingered bullfighter from Juarez. This woman is an artist, trained at the Latin-American school of medicine in Havana.

Lizzie: Medical school? She is very pretty…. Are you sure she isn't another wife of yours?

Red: Lizzie, we've discussed about this! She dropped out in the last year of her residency. Discúlpanos por un momen, por favor.

Red's libido: And now we're finally alone! Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

Lizzie's morality: Your ex-wife... Have you found her?

Red's libido: Oh…. so you're not in the mood. I told you that you're the only one!

Red: Monarch Douglas bank.

Lizzie: What?

Red: Well, you wanted to get down on business("to defeat the huns"). It's the preferred bank of international criminals, dictators, terrorists, hedge-fund managers. They're headquartered here in the U.S., deposits insured by the FDIC, which places them firmly within your agency's jurisdictional bailiwick. It is the last place on earth that anyone would ever want to rob. Less than two hours ago, Monarch's Warsaw branch was assaulted.

Lizzie's morality: What was stolen?

Red: According to the official statement, nothing.

Lizzie: And according to you?

Red: Everything.

_Later…._

Lizzie: Smells like roses.

Red's heart: _"You are the rose of my heart, You are the love of my life, A flower not fading nor falling apart, If you're tired, rest your head on my arm, Rose of my heart"_

Red: Set a match to it... See if it burns. Check if it's flammable.

Lizzie's morality: What? Why? It's flammable.

Red: Jam. From the heart of the rum-soaked, rose-petal Paczki.

Lizzie's morality: Lovely. Now what?

Red: Now? Nothing. Just get some rest. I'll be there in less than three hours.

_Then…._

Lizzie's morality: Reddington. How did you...?

Red: Enough with the guns. I love trains! My grandfather rode the rails. Have you ever seen "The General"? Buster Keaton? Oh, my goodness!

Lizzie's morality: What are you doing?

Red: Dubicki said the bridge was swarming with police. I booked the two of you first-class tickets home.

Agent Donald Ressler: No, you can't take her! No!

Red: Guys, guys, enough with the pointing! Don't worry, Donald. They won't shoot you. But they will restrain you... rigorously if necessary. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have business to attend to. Be sure they make their flight.

Agent Donald Ressler: He's such a jerk sometimes!

Lizzie: He is like that all the time… I wanna stab him with a pen!

Agent Donald Ressler: You did that already. Don't you remember?

Lizzie: Of course I remember. He was asking for it!

_Later…._

Berlin: I almost gave up looking for you. You were like a ghost for 12 years. Heard rumors and I followed them...from Barcelona to Melbourne to Stockholm. But always nothing. Until one day... I made a connection: Elizabeth Keen. That's why we're sitting here today...because of Keen. I know you care for her as much as you care for your wife! I think underneath it all, under that hat of yours, you're not much different from, uh, Twila Stansberry. You have the power to destroy me, but you're offering me a way out because you're blinded by passion.

Red: Oh, no, you didn't! Don't you dare brought Lizzie into this_!" I'm a dagger in your back, An extra turn upon the rack, I'm the quivering of your heart, A stabbing pain, a sudden start."_

_Then…._

Lizzie: Hey, Rosa.

Rosa: Please don't hurt me! I need this job! He is just my boss, I swear!

Lizzie: We're gonna talk about this later. We know you're treating Kaja. Where's your patient?

Rosa: I don't know...

Lizzie's morality: I came alone. I don't want to have to call for backup.

_On the phone…_

Red: Lizzie, how was your flight?

Lizzie: I know what you're trying to pull, and it's not gonna happen.

Red: Abort mission! I repeat abort mission!

Red's libido: She knows that I want to seduce her tonight!

Red: What I'm trying to pull? Is that how we speak to each other now... as if I'm some kind of cheap, dime-store confidence man?

Lizzie: Bank robber, embezzler, thief. You put us on this case so you could get to the girl so you could steal Berlin's money.

Red: At least she doesn't know about my seduction plans.

Lizzie: You're gonna use her to get your wife back. And you will leave me for her! I knew it!

Red:"_Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you."_

Lizzie's morality: That money is going to fund terror all over the world, and I'm not gonna let that happen for the sake of one woman.

Red: You don't have a vote.

Lizzie's morality: I found Kaja. We froze the escrow accounts where you parked Berlin's cash.

Red: My wife will die.

Lizzie's morality: I'm sorry!

Lizzie: I'm not Adele, I don't wish "nothing but the best" for you. DIE BITCH!

Red: No, you're not sorry. Not yet. Maybe someday, if you're very lucky, you might wonder: "at exactly what point did I become this... thing?" But not now. Right now, you're just doing your job.

Lizzie: Excuse me? I'm just doing my job?! I care for you! I lov….. Don't go through with it! We can find another way!

Red: The deal is moving forward.

Lizzie: You can't hold up your end! He'll kill you. I need you!

Red: Wish me luck.

_More later…._

Lizzie: Your door was open. Were you expecting me?

Red: Yes. Thank you!

Lizzie's morality: You're an asset I'm charged with protecting. I transferred the money to keep you safe. I was just doing my job. As far as I'm concerned, every life that that psycho takes from this point forward is on you.

Lizzie: I hope she's worth it!

Red: When I was standing there wondering if you had decided to let me die, a thought struck me...how did you know that Berlin had his money in that bank? At first, I thought it was the girl... that she told you. But the accounts would be coded, moved through shell corporations, layers of protection. And then I realized, " No. Somebody has a secret Santa: a source." Bravo, Lizzie! When you're ready to share, I'd love to hear.

Lizzie: Yeah, sure, like's that gonna happen!


	21. Stay away from my man!

Episode 3

Tom( the name's Bag. Douche Bag): Looking for this?

Lizzie: _"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit_."

Lizzie's morality: I'll scream!

Tom: Don't. Listen to me! Reddington knows where I am. He found me, and he is coming here, but you need to know that you can't trust him. He is using you! And when Berlin is dead, he will kill you.

Lizzie: If you're trying to help me, why don't you put the gun down?

Tom: Has he told you? Has he told you anything about that night, about the fire? You need to ask him, Liz, for the truth about why he turned himself in to the FBI.

Lizzie: No!

Red( walk into the club like what up I need to save my lady): This is why I do everything myself! You had ONE FUCKING JOB, Lizzie!

Tom: Go ahead and ask him, Liz.

Red's hat: Just die already!

Tom: Make him answer! You deserve to know the truth. Your father, Naomi Hyland... Red doesn't want you to know that that night, the night of the fire...

Red:*shoots Tom* Much better! What do you want, Agent Keen?

Lizzie:*heavy breathing*

Lizzie's libido( Yay, first appearance): WHAT A GRAND TIME TO BE ALIVE!

Lizzie's morality: Conceal, don't feel, don't let him see!

Red:*he approached her* What do you really want?

Lizzie:"_Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want, So tell me what you want, what you really really want, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want, So tell me what you want, what you really really want, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really wanna zigazig ha." _*wakes up*

Lizzie's libido: Of course it had to be a dream!

_Later…._

Lizzie's morality: Where's Naomi Hyland?

Red: You know, it's hard to say. I've never been great at reading that woman's emotions.

Lizzie's morality: I need to talk to her!

Red: You want to talk to her... perhaps some lingering personal questions you think my ex-wife can answer.

Lizzie: You're hiding her from me.

Red: Of course. She will tell you embarrassing stories about me, which are not true! At all! Lizzie, some of the worst of the worst are still alive because Dr. Covington is saving them.

Lizzie: You know how to find him?

Red: No. Slushie?

Lizzie: Pass.

Red: Oh, my gosh! You have no idea what you're missing. Try a grapefruit gusher. It's just like you today... a little sour.

Lizzie's libido: You'll be sour too if you wake up to realize that that wonderful, amazing moment was just a dream!

_Then…._

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: I want to introduce you to Samar Navabi. Agent Ressler, Keen, I believe you two have already met.

Samar Navabi: In Warsaw. Glad to see you made it out.

Lizzie's morality: NOPE!

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Agent Navabi is on loan to our task force indefinitely.

Agent Donald Ressler: You're the one who found Reddington. I hunted the guy for five years. How long did it take you?

Samar Navabi: Well, it was... uh, 74 days. We were lucky.

Lizzie: Just no….stop talking!

Lizzie's morality: How does an Iranian end up working for Mossad?

Samar Navabi: How did the FBI end up working for Raymond Reddington?

Lizzie's morality: How did you find us in Warsaw? Who told you we were there?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Wow, there, ladies, there's no need for violence. Samar, I know you're new and all, but Reddington is off limits.

_In the car…._

Lizzie: So, you know him?

Lizzie's libido: I had a wet dream about you last night. Would you like to make it a reality?

Lizzie's morality: What is wrong with me?!

Red: Know him? Oh, my gosh. I once shared a ride with the man on a twin-engine prop from Port-Au-Prince to Baracoa. We had to counterweight the plane with three containers of Russian R.P.G.s just to accommodate his girth.

Lizzie's morality: I would have thought he'd be more cautious about where he chooses to hang out.

Red: Well, B.B.'s an indulgent man. He loves to be surrounded with what he loves the most.

_More later….._

Samar Navabi: You caught Covington, and the child is in recovery. It sounds like a victory.

Lizzie: Yeah…. whatever you say.

Samar Navabi: You guys don't celebrate when you close a big case? Come on. Let me buy you a drink.

Lizzie: I don't like your face!

Samar Navabi: All you know about me is that I found Reddington and whatever you might have read in a slim dossier. And now we're working together with all that that implies. I'm sure you don't know what to think.

Lizzie's morality: You're wrong if you think you found Reddington. If he was found, it's because he wanted to be and he wanted you to find him. If he wanted you here, he has a reason. That's why I don't trust you... because I don't know what the reason is and I'm guessing neither do you.

Lizzie: And stay away from my man!


	22. I think he knows my secret

Episode 4

Red: I need to know where Jennifer is!

Naomi Hyland: I kept my end of the bargain, I didn't say anything about you or Elizabeth. How much does she know?

Red: Very little.

Naomi: A-are the... are the two of you, what, working together? You two did the frickle frackle? I don't even want to know how you pulled that off.

Red's libido: Not yet….

_Later….._

Lizzie's morality: Where's Naomi Hyland?

Red: In safe hands.

Lizzie's morality: What does that mean... you've already set her up with a cozy new life in Saint Kitts or Solvang?

Red: Solvang? I never send anyone I care about to Solvang.

Lizzie's morality: She spent nine days with Berlin. We have to debrief her. She could know something... his real name, his location…your secrets.

Red: Did you read about that housewife in Reston?

Lizzie:*bangs her head* Here we go again…..

Lizzie's morality: 100% done!

Red: She shot a bank manager.

Lizzie: You're not hiding her from the FBI, you're hiding her from me.

Red: Violent crime in D.C. is at a 20-year low, and yet in the last four months, there have been seven random acts of violence by individuals with no prior criminal record.

*two very boring minutes later*

I believe this murder in Reston is part of an underground social psychology experiment.

Lizzie: Oh Lord...Please give me patience…..because if you give me strength I'll just beat him to death!

Lizzie's morality: Conducted by our government.

_On the phone…._

Red: Oh, my God. Is that what they call him in Tel Aviv? I haven't spoken to Haskell in years.

Lizzie: But you know where to find him?

Red: I do. But it's a sticky situation.

Lizzie: What did you do?

Red: What? Why would you assume I did something?

Lizzie's morality: Ummm... excuse me! Have you met yourself? What did you do, steal his wife?

Red: No. Old Haskell and I had somewhat of a falling-out at the craps table.

_Then…._

Red: Hask...

Haskell Twain: Nope *slams the door*

Red: Oh come on, that was like 8 years ago! Let it go!

Lizzie: Why am I not surprised?

Haskell Twain: I have no interest in seeing you. Go away! You're not welcome here.

Red: Haskell, I told you I'm sorry. What more can I say?

Haskell Twain: You knew I was in recovery!

Red: I didn't... okay. Yes, I did. But you were having such a great time. And after everything that happened with Sheryl and that... Cuban, the boxer... what was his name?

Lizzie: You are so full of shit….

Haskell Twain: I'm not talking to you about this! Your tricks won't work on me….

Red: Did I mention that I brought you money?

Haskell Twain: I forgive you!

Red: My friend, Miss Watkins, is a blogger looking for her first scoop.

Lizzie: I write mostly about social-science experiments. Researching one right now, actually... the black-ops project Subproject 7.

Haskell Twain: Who can resist that face? Why don't we take this into my office?

Red: I'm so proud of my wifey! *touching Lizzie's back*

Lizzie: #Fangirling

Lizzie's morality: Really?

Lizzie: But he just touched me…. asdfghjkl.

Lizzie's morality: Control yourself, woman!

Haskell Twain: Here she is... government white paper on Subproject 7.

Lizzie's morality: I've seen the white paper. It's heavily redacted.

Haskell Twain: Challenge accepted!

Lizzie: Wha... how did you?

Red: Haskell's quite a puzzle man. Spends his days combing through thousands of pages of redacted government documents, comparing them to defense-authorization reports, executive orders. He's found a way to read between the lines.

_Later…._

Lizzie: Hello, Mrs. Hyland.

Naomi: Does Raymond know you're here?

Lizzie: No, he doesn't want us to talk.

Lizzie's morality: I have a ton of questions in this notebook about the case, but the truth is, I didn't come here just to ask you about Berlin.

Naomi: You want to know things about Raymond?

Lizzie: You were married to the man, I need to know how he is like.

Red: *listening at the door*

Naomi: Well he used to snore and that man won't brush his teeth without a backup plan! I blame myself. I fell for those broad shoulders. I didn't realize there wasn't much sitting on top of them!

Red: *gasps* How dare you!

Lizzie: The day Raymond Reddington walked into my life, everything changed... everything I believed about.

Naomi: He wants something from you. It's a game, it's a manipulation. He's made you feel a connection that makes you feel like you matter somehow. And there's no one on earth who can make a woman feel like the center of his universe more than Raymond Reddington!

Red: Bitch please!

Naomi: I'll tell you this, though. He's not who you think he is.

Lizzie: What does he want from me?

Red: Well. Look at the two of you! I should have brought a bottle of chardonnay.

Lizzie: Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!

Red: I have your papers, Dembe's outside. He'll need your signature on some of the documents. Frank is gonna pack the car.

Naomi: On a scale of 1 to 10, how dead am I?

Red: 11.

Lizzie: Maybe he is a little upset ….

Red: Agent Keen, I hope you had an illuminating conversation!

Lizzie: Or not….

_More later….._

Red: So, how'd your case go?

Lizzie's morality: I think you know the answer to that. Who is he?

Red: Who is who?

Lizzie's morality: The gunman, the sniper. He works for you, doesn't he? How long has he been following me?

Red: Since the day Agent Malik died.

Lizzie: I want him gone! I'm an independent woman who don't need no protection!

Red: My associate saves your life, and instead of saying "thank you," you try to get him fired. If I knew better, I'd say you were hiding something!

Lizzie's morality: I resemble that remark!

Lizzie: I think he knows my secret. Abort mission! I repeat: abort mission! Code Red!


	23. Oh, God, I am not jealous!

Episode 5

Lizzie: I told you to get rid of him!

Red: Lizzie, I'm not getting rid of him! Your safety is of great concern to me.

Dembe: Here we go away…. They always act like an old married couple, I just want to lock them in a room so they can solve their problems. Why they just can't stop fighting and make up?#shipping problems.

Lizzie: Yeah, I can handle myself. I just... I don't want him watching me.

Red: Don't worry, I'm your number one fan! _"Every breath you take, Every move you make, Every bond you break, Every step you take, I'll be watching you."_

_Later….._

Lillian Sharp: This map is priceless! You need to move on this now. If the Apophis Strain is out there...

Lizzie: Who the fuck are you?

Lillian Sharp: Who the fuck are you?

Lizzie: I asked you first!

Lillian Sharp: I asked you second!

Lizzie's morality: You didn't tell this to the FBI?

Red: Lillian is paid to embargo certain key details from your colleagues if she believes they may be of interest to me.

Lillian Sharp: You sure she can be trusted?

Red: Oh, wrong thing to say… you better start running!

Lizzie: Oh… come closer, bitch! Let me show you how much can you trust me.

Lizzie's morality: I could say the same thing about you!

Red: Ladies, please, there's no need to fight! I'm surprised the two of you haven't met at a conference or company retreat. Does the FBI do a Christmas party?

Lillian Sharp: One of the priests sent to guard the strain got sick. And to protect it, the dying man swallowed it whole, taking it to his grave. We know this because the others survived and created the map.

Lizzie's morality: And the markings? What do they mean?

Lillian Sharp: They're archetypal alignments. When you connect them, they create lay lines linking a network of historically significant sites.

Lizzie's morality: You said the priests were sent to the end of the world. Where?

Lillian Sharp: Well, I said it was the end of the world... not anymore. If I'm reading this correctly, the strain is buried here., in America.

_Then…._

Red: Hello, Aram, Agent Navabi. You certainly look radiant.

Aram Mojtabai: Mr. Reddington. Um...hey, uh...

Aram's conscience : You can do this, Aram! Just say something…it's not that hard! He's probably looking for his girlfriend.

Aram: If you're looking for, uh, A-Agent Keen...

Red: I'm not, I'm looking for you.

Aram: *gasps* What? But I thought you only speak to Elizabeth Keen! My whole life was a lie!

Lizzie: Aram, are you there? What is it? Is Red there? Is he flirting with Agent Navabi? Tell me!

_Later…._

Aram: Agent Keen, whatever decision you made, I'm sure it was the right one! I've seen you under pressure in the moment.

Lizzie: Thank you.

Aram: The way you handle... take Mr. Reddington, for example. He asked me to do one thing, and I freeze up, but you're always able to... I mean you two are practically married!

Lizzie: What? What? What are you talking about?

Aram's conscience: You had ONE JOB, Aram, ONE JOB!

Aram: Oh, wait. Uh, no, just, um... You're solid.

Lizzie: Reddington asked you to do?

Aram: No, forget that, bad example.

Lizzie: What did Reddington ask you to do?

Aram: Um...please don't be mad, but he asked me to find him a girl.

Lizzie: What?! What girl? Is she pretty?

*twenty minutes later*

Lizzie's morality: Your wife made it perfectly clear that your daughter has no interest in seeing you.

Red: Oh, dear!

Lizzie's morality: If she is in danger, we will protect her, either from Berlin or you!

Red: Who told you she's my daughter?

Lizzie: Nobody, but she is very pretty so naturally I want her to be your daughter.

Red: Lizzie, you are so sweet when you are jealous!

Lizzie's morality: Oh, God, I am not jealous!

Lizzie: Well, get ready because I'm about to be GORGEOUS!

Red: I assure you, Lizzy, my quest to find this young woman will in no way compromise our relationship_! "You're the one that I want, You are the one I want, Oo,Oo,Oo honey"_

Lizzie's morality: Our relationship? You wish!

Red: Denial ain't just a river in Egypt, sweetheart!

_On the phone…._

Aram: Okay, I can do this! Mr. Reddington, I-I'm calling about Agent Keen.

Aram's conscience: See? That wasn't that hard, was it?

Red: Circumstances have changed, Aram. I found what I was looking for.

Aram: That's great but your girlfriend is in danger!

Red: I'm coming, Lizzie!* Rocky theme song starts playing in the background*

_Then….._

Lizzie: I was gonna have a baby...and then he showed up.

Samar: You know everyone talks about it, right? They say you are the Clarice to his Hannibal. They don't want to bring it up with you. Why you? Who is he to you?_"__I don't know who he is but I think that you do, Dag gummit, Who is he and what is he to you"_

Lizzie's morality: Reddington is... the bane of my existence.

Lizzie: Reddington is...my big bad handsome man.

Lizzie's libido: Reddington is…. someone who I'll like to get better acquainted with.

Lizzie's morality: I find myself feeling possessive.

Samar: Mm, you don't say!

Lizzie's morality: Possessive of him, jealous of the girl he's trying to protect. And if that's not embarrassing enough, that's exactly how he predicted I'd feel.

_More later….._

Red: _"Oh no, not my baby, Oh no, not my sweet baby" _*holds her hand* You're too precious for words!*strokes her finger* I can't wait to put a ring on it!

Red's hat: Aww! I may be a hat but I have feelings too!

*"I will always love you" starts playing in the background*


	24. What are you going to do, spank me?

Episode 6

Red: Wow. So nostalgic, such memories, much happy! The charming and yet tragic naiveté, as if these creatures will somehow flourish if Harlan and Jack can just manage to relocate a breeding female.

Lizzie's morality: That's very interesting but let's move on to our case… the Mombasa Cartel. Poachers? Really?

Red: Not poachers, Lizzie, traffickers. The poor devils who do the killing are the smallest of cogs in a very large machine. And the Mombasa Cartel is the worst of the lot. They operate behind an impenetrable veil of secrecy, enforced by brute terror and a rat's nest of corporate fronts...

Lizzie's morality: This is going to take some convincing. The FBI's job is to protect people.

Red: Granted. Let's forget about the animals for a moment. Let's just consider the human toll...

Lizzie: Please, never stop talking! Is it possible to marry a voice? "N_othing else can speak to my heart like his voice, No one else can hold me, No one else can love me, No one else can speak to my heart like his voice"_

Red: The thorough corruption of local authorities, political assassinations, the massacres of entire villages and wildlife compounds, eradicated for the most base of all possible motives... profit! Hundreds of billions of dollars a year in blood money, human blood money.

Lizzie's morality: This is important to you!

Red: Was that so obvious? I need to practice my poker face.

Lizzie: Oh, my poor baby! Who hurt you?

Red: Someday the creatures on that program will be akin to unicorns and griffins, a fairy-tale bestiary written in past tense, and no one is lifting a finger to stop it. Why not, Lizzie? Why not us? _" If two people can have it all, Live the dream and break the rules, Tell me, why not us? If to people can fall in love, Destiny should be enough, So tell me, why not us?"_

_Later…_

Red: I've arranged drinks for you with Geoff Perl.

Lizzie: Who will be joining us? Bill Gateswaenfett? See, I'm actually a funny person.

Red: No, just you and Geoff. Despite being the 33rd richest man on the planet and the C.E.O of Deckard Capital, Geoff is a passionat advocate for wildlife protection. He's also an expert on the illegal-animal trade. If anyone knows anything about the Mombasa Cartel, it'll be Geoff.

Lizzie: Wanna hear a joke? What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Lizzie's morality: Please stop!

Red: Look at us, holding hands and making jokes_…."__I'm walking on sunshine , wooah, I'm walking on sunshine, woooah, I'm walking on sunshine, woooah, and don't it feel good!"_

Red's hat: #chilling with my bae.

Red's sunglasses: _" Pretty woman, won't you pardon me, Pretty woman, I couldn't help see, Pretty woman, That you look lovely as can be, Are you lonely just like me"_

Red: Your name is Judy is Judy 're an activist,investigative reporter,researching an exposéon the Mombasa post under the screen name "Elsa."

Lizzie: _" Let it go, let it go, Can't hold it back anymore, Let it go, let it go, Turn away and slam the door, I don't care what they're going to say, Let the storm rage on, The cold never bothered me anyway"_

Red: Do you wanna build a snowman?

Lizzie's morality: Go away, Red!

Red: Okay, bye.

_Then…_

Red: Was all this really necessary?

Lizzie's morality: How about I find someone to follow you around 24-7 and see how you like it?

Dembe: Is like watching a movie…. I just need popcorn. Please make out already!

Red: You know as well as I this has nothing to do with being followed. This is about being found out, you're hiding something! Why else risk my capture?

Red's libido: You have been very naughty. Go to my room!

Lizzie's morality: Ezra's not gonna talk.

Red: I know that, but you didn't. And now you're holding him in a cement box under a no-contact order. Congratulations, Lizzie! You've plugged the hole, but the dam will fail.

Lizzie's morality: Excuse me?

Red: It's only a matter of time. * he approaches her*

Lizzie's libido: What are you going to do, spank me?

Red's libido: Yes!

Dembe: Now kiss!

Episode 7

Samar Navabi: So, what exactly did Reddington say?

Lizzie: Uh, it was Dembe. He said Red had another case but he specifically asked that you come along.

Samar: Oh, a threesome. Does that bother you?

Lizzie's morality: Why would it? I'm not jealous!

Lizzie: I wonder why he asked for you….. it's obvious he loves me!

Samar: I thought he only spoke to you. Don't want to step on your toes, I don't want to end up dead in an alley.

Lizzie's morality: I'm... fine. My toes are fine.

Lizzie: If you try anything I will kill you! Red is mine!

Red: Ah, ladies, thank God you showed up. I took a left turn in the Rostropovich, I've ended up completely lost in the Chico Hamilton. This is an addiction. I just can't decide between...

Samar: Is he always like this?

Lizzie: Yep, that's my man!

Lizzie's morality: Why did you want both of us here?

Red: Both... you're right. Thank you, great idea! Anyway, funny story, stop me if you've heard it! Persian man walks into a bar, meets a beautiful woman, has a few drinks. Next thing you know, he's falling from a 12-story balcony.

Lizzie's morality: I don't get it.

Red: I imagine Agent Navabi does.

Lizzie: Oh, no! They're bonding!

_In the car…_

Red: How exactly did you come upon this information?

Lizzie's morality: A C.I., someone the Bureau trusts.

Red: Really? I don't believe you! If the Bureau had a lead, they'd follow it. You came to this on your own, and you're hiding it from them, coming to me instead. You'd rather see Berlin dead than arrested.

Lizzie: Berlin killed Meera, he nearly killed Cooper! He put Tom into my life. So if you're asking if I'm okay with a lethal outcome, damn right I am!

Red: If you hadn't told me you'd killed Tom, I might think he was your source!

Lizzie: Don't panic! Take a deep breath, I know you can do this!

Lizzie's morality: But I did kill him!

Red: Of course you did. I believe you….

Lizzie: That was close….

Bonus scenes from episode 1 season 1:

Red: Now, I'll give you Zamani, but first...

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: No "but firsts." You don't decide anything.

Red: #Rude! Agent Cooper, you've overestimated your authority. I said I'll help you find Zamani, and I will. But from this point forward, there's one very important rule... I speak only with Elizabeth Keen!

Agent Donald Ressler: Who the hell's Elizabeth Keen?

_Later…_

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Agent Keen, am I getting that right?

Lizzie's morality: Yes, sir. Best day of my life! #Fangirling.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Harold Cooper, Assistant Director of Counterterrorism.

Lizzie's morality: Yes, sir, I know who you are, sir!

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: So, uh...can you tell us what's going on? Is he your boyfriend?

Agent Donald Ressler: Do you two have a sexual relationship?

Lizzie's morality: What? No! I have no history with Reddington.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Do you find it odd that Reddington surrendered himself the day you started working as a profiler?

Lizzie: I think that it suggests he was waiting for me.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Why you? Specifically.

Lizzie: Because I'm new and he thinks I can be easily manipulated. The man obviously doesn't know me very well, I'm gonna kick his ass!

_Then…_

Lizzie: *watching Reddington* I didn't expect him to be so attractive!

Red: Agent Keen, what a pleasure!

Lizzie: Well... I'm here.

Agent Donald Ressler: Sir, this doesn't remind you of a movie?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: What do you mean?

Agent Donald Ressler: Sir, you never saw The Silence of the Lambs? "A young F.B.I. cadet must confide in an incarcerated and manipulative killer to receive his help on catching another serial killer who skins his victims." And in the books they run away as lovers.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: I'm sure it's nothing…. It's not like they flirted or anything!

Lizzie: Why involve me? I'm nobody. It's my first day, nothing special about me.

Red: Oh, I think you're very special!

Agent Donald Ressler: That sounds like flirting to me!


	25. Lizzington Christmas edition

Guess which story got a new chapter! That's right, this one ;)

May your Christmas be filled with lots of happiness, peace and love... ooh and lots of presents :)

* * *

Lizzington Christmas edition

Agent Donald Ressler: What a lovely day, Christmas is coming!

* twelve seconds later*

Agent Donald Ressler: Oh, no, I just gave myself a nasty paper cut! I am killed, what irony is this?

Lizzie: * enters the room, quickly closing the door behind* Are you ok?

Agent Donald Ressler: Oops, never mind. My flesh was merely grazed.

Lizzie's morality: Please help hide from…..*"All I want for Christmas is you" starts playing in the distance* Oh, it's too late!

Agent Donald Ressler: What? Who are you hiding from?

Red: *dramatically enters the office* Lizzie, there you are! I've been looking for you everywhere. I dedicate this song to you: _"I don't want a lot for Christmas, There is just one thing I need, I don't care about the presents, Underneath the Christmas tree."_

Red's heart: _I just want you for my own, More than you could ever know, Make my wish come true, All I want for Christmas, Is you, you yeah."_

Lizzie: That is so sweet!

Lizzie's morality: I have to admit, it's really a nice gesture. But that doesn't mean that I forgive him for hiding mistletoe everywhere in the Post Office!

Red: Please do not be alarmed if a big man wearing a red suit picks you up and throws you into a bag.

Lizzie: Why?

Red: Because I asked for you for Christmas!

Agent Donald Ressler: Get a room you two love birds!

Lizzie's morality: Ressler! I thought you were my friend!

_Later….._

Lizzie's morality: Let me out! You can't do this to me!

Agent Donald Ressler: You need this! You will thank us later.

Dembe: Have fun, you two!

Red: Why are you being so dramatic? Is it that bad to be locked in a room with me? _"Don't, Don't you want me? You know I can't believe it when I hear that you won't see me, Don't, Don't you want me? You know I don't believe you when you say that you don't need me"_

Lizzie's morality: Yes, I may accidentally kiss you and we can't have that!

Lizzie: Because I know I will enjoy it so much!

Lizzie's libido: Damn right!

Red: You know…. The last time I celebrated Christmas was more than 20 years ago. But if I am bothering you with my presence, I'll go….

Lizzie's morality: Fine, I'm not a cruel monster. You can stay here.

Lizzie: Why didn't you celebrate Christmas before?

Red: It was Christmas Eve and I ran out of gas. I pulled off to the side of the road. Seemed like it'd been snowing for days, no traffic, no cars to come help, just me and a car full of gifts. I must have walked four miles, five, maybe. It was so still, just cold and white. The whole time, all I could think about was them in our house. The warm light in the windows, the smoke from the chimney, the sound of my daughter at the piano, the smell of the tree and the fire, oyster stew on the stove. I was so upset to think that I'd ruined Christmas for them, being late, leaving the gifts in the car. But the closer I got, the more I realized how funny the whole thing was, how much they'd love the story, daddy running out of gas, how every Christmas they'd get such joy from telling that story at my expense.

Lizzie's morality: I have the feeling that now comes the sad part of the story…. brace yourself!

Red: And then, finally... I got there. I walked through the door and there was... just blood. All I saw was blood, all there was was blood.

Lizzie's morality: What? Who's crying? I'm not crying! Shut up!*sobs*

Lizzie: I'm in a glass case of emotion!

* Meanwhile*

Agent Donald Ressler: What's happening? I can't hear what are they saying.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: They are kissing?

Samar Navabi: Not yet. I think they're hugging.

* twelve seconds later*

Red: May I kiss you? Please say yes, please say yes!

Lizzie: I thought you'd never ask. Finally!

Lizzie's morality: I'm only doing this because I'm feeling compassionate today. That's the only reason!

Lizzie's libido: _"__I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it, I'm about to lose control and I think I like it, I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it, And I know, I know, I know, I know, I know I want you, want you"_

Red: *kisses Lizzie*

Red's heart: _"Could I hold you for a lifetime, Could I look into your eyes, Could I have this night to share this night together, Could I hold you close beside me, Could I hold you for all time, Could I could I have this kiss forever, Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever"_

Lizzie: Yes!

Lizzie's libido: Hell yeah!

Lizzie's morality: Okay, it wasn't bad….I have to admit. But it's a one time thing!

Dembe: That awesome stupendous glorious moment when your OTP BECOMES CANON!

Daddygater: So what if he kissed her passionately on the lips? My father does that all the time. It's obvious he is her father!

Agent Donald Ressler:What?

Dembe: I'm gonna kill him! I'm gonna finish him like a cheesecake!


	26. I want to stay in his arms forever!

**A/N**: Thank you so much for all the reviews/follow/favorites, they mean so much to me!

Can't wait for the next episode!

* * *

Episode 8

Lizzie's morality: You're working with Berlin?! What is wrong with you? I leave you alone for a few seconds and you do what?

Red: I need to talk to you about a bombing in the Soviet Union... Kursk, 1991.

Lizzie: What the hell is going on?! Explain!

Red: We're shaking a few trees. There's been a development: it seems Berlin is merely a pawn who's been tragically manipulated. Now we are BFF. We even started a club, it's called "My daughter doesn't want anything to do with me". On Wednesdays we wear fedoras.

Red's hat: I'm sorry, but you are not invited!

Lizzie: Men…. can't live with them, can't stab them with a pen! Oh, wait, I did that!

Lizzie's morality: Manipulated by who?

Red: That's what Brimley's trying to ascertain.

Lizzie: Berlin killed Meera, he put Tom in my life, and every time you have a chance to stop him, you let him go. Should I be jealous of him too?

Red: Berlin will be held accountable for his actions after I acquire the name of the man who set him against me, a man they call The Decembrist. If you want to find the one ultimately responsible for gutting Harold Cooper and killing Meera Malik, I suggest you help me find him.

_Later…_

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Contact the D.C. field office. Get me an update on any eyewitnesses, satellite footage. Alan Fitch's abduction must be on Mossad's radar. Reach out to your people in Tel Aviv. And you... talk to your boyfriend!

Lizzie's morality: What?

Red: Elizabeth, we need to talk! Now!

Agent Donald Ressler: Someone's in trouble….. trouble in Paradise?

Samar Navabi: You in danger, girl!

Lizzie: Frick! What's that supposed to mean?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Move along, people, nothing to see here. Can't a couple have a little privacy?

*twelve seconds later*

Red's libido: Take off your clothes!

Lizzie's morality: Excuse me?

Lizzie: Yes!

Lizzie's libido: My time has come!

Red: Tom.

Lizzie: What?

Lizzie's morality: _"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit" _He knows…..I'm so dead!

Red: You told me Tom is dead, he's not. Liar liar, plants for hire!

Lizzie's morality: It's pants on fire, Red.

Red: You would know, liar! I'm disappointed you haven't felt that you could trust me enough to tell me this….

Lizzie's moraliy: Look, okay, I lied. But I only kept it a secret because I know you want him dead.

Red: No, you kept it a secret because you didn't want to admit to yourself that you still love him, that even after everything he has done, after how horribly he treated you, you still can't let him go. So... you're playing house.

Lizzie: Excuse me? That's rude!

Red: I need to know everything he can tell you about Berlin's former safe houses, former contacts. All that matters is finding Alan Fitch!

Lizzie: _"I need to know now, know now, Can you love me again? I need to know now, know now, Can you love me again?"_

_Then…_

Agent Donald Ressler: Liz, why would you do this? I mean, you're risking everything.

Lizzie's morality: To find Berlin.

Agent Donald Ressler: You're a federal agent harboring a fugitive. I mean, worse than that...you're keeping him captive.

Lizzie's morality: 500 cops are out there looking for Fitch right now, and we're gonna find him because of this.

Agent Donald Ressler: #500% done with your shit. Whether he leads us to Fitch or not, I got to take him in. Are you hearing me? You had to know when you told me that this is where it was gonna go. I... Liz, I can't be part of this.

Lizzie's morality: He's an informant, like Reddington.

Agent Donald Ressler: The difference is you're not in love with Reddington.

Lizzie: Yeah, my secret is safe! He doesn't know about my feelings for Red!

Agent Donald Ressler: I see how you and Reddington act around each other. Love can't even begin to describe your relationship.

Lizzie: I did not expect that…

_Later….._

Lizzie: _" It's time to clean up, It's time to clean up, Clean up, clean up, It's time to clean up"_

Red: Your gentleman friend with the earring said he moved the body.

Lizzie: You scared the hell out of me!

Red: Mr. Kaplan is with him now. We're trying to contain the situation. You should have come to me!

Lizzie's morality: I didn't need to. I don't need your help!

Red: Look around you, Lizzie.

Lizzie's morality: We found Fitch because of Tom.

Red: It wasn't worth it... Not if the cost was you, here in this filth.

Lizzie's morality: I couldn't do it. I told you I could kill Tom, but after you left, I just… After all the lies and everything he did to me, I told myself I was using him, that I was finally in control.

Red: When you love someone, you have no control. That's what love is...being powerless. I know from experience! And yes, I'm talking about my feelings for you…..

Lizzie: I don't know what's wrong with me!

Red: There's nothing wrong with you! *embraces her*

Lizzington shippers: My ship is on a ship!

Lizzie: I want to stay in his arms forever!

_More later….. _

Red: You are never to see her again!

Tom: Yeah, I got it.

Dembe: Douchebag!

Red: I don't think you do. Look at me! * grabs his arm* You are never to see her again!

Tom: _"And I'm thinking about how people fall in love in mysterious ways, Maybe just the touch of a hand"_

Red: "_Just go, Die mother fucker, die mother fucker die "_

Tom: You know, for what it's worth, I spent four months on that ship chained up and I never told her about us. Not one word.

Red: There is no us and there will never be! You told me you love me and I love your ex-wife. Ain't life a bitch?

Tom:#Rejected. One day you'll be mine!


	27. Damsel in distress

I am really really sorry for the long wait! I'm in my last year of high school, I have a very important exam in july so you can't expect me to update very quickly...Thank you so much for all the reviews/favorite, they mean so much to me!

* * *

Episode 9

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Reddington's off the radar.

Lizzie's morality: What do you mean? We don't know where Reddington is?

Lizzie: Where is he? Is he alright?

Lizzie's morality: Do I have to save his ass again?! #so tired #actual 5 years old

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: CIA's not saying.

Lizzie's morality: Why not? Reddington's our asset!

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Only 41 people in the US government know that. I've talked to all of them, nobody knows where he is.

Samar Navabi: He's been on the run for 25 years. His arrest was bound to happen.

Agent Donald Ressler: No, Reddington moves too fluidly to get caught up in something as obvious as a public assassination in Hong Kong. No, he wanted this to happen.

Samar Navabi: His arrest happened overseas. We have to assume he wanted proximity to something.

Agent Donald Ressler: Well, if he's grabbed, it's either by the CIA ground branch or JSOC.

Lizzie's morality: You think it's an intelligence apparatus that's holding him? He's such a damsel in distress…here we go again! "_I'm just your average ordinary everyday superhero, Trying to save the world, but never really sure"_

_Later…_

Agent Donald Ressler: We got him! CIA analyst at Langley confirmed they're holding Reddington at an off-book lockdown called The Factory.

Samar Navabi: That's bad news, that's really bad news!

Lizzie: On a scale of 1-10 how screwed are we?

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: It's a level-10 detention facility specifically designed to process detainees who've been trained to withstand interrogation and torture. Assets are brought in, information is squeezed out- data, intel, anything that may be of value.

Aram Mojtabai: This place is a slaughterhouse for spies.

Lizzie: Great…so we're hella screwed!

Lizzie's morality: We've got to get him out of there! He's mine! I mean….he's our asset.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper, Aram Mojtabai, Samar Navabi, Agent Donald Ressler, basically everyone in The Post Office: Sure… #not buying it face

_Then…_

Lizzie_:" I am a woman on a mission whoa, Nothing can stop me, I'm stronger than ever, I'm gonna see this through, I am a woman on a mission whoa, Whatever it takes I will do what I gotta do_" *someone grabs her from behind*

Red's libido: Well, look who I ran into….. Do you want to go in the janitor's closet and make out? * "Careless whisper" starts playing in the distance*

Lizzie's libido_:"Touch me like you do, touch me like you do, What are you waiting for?"_

Red: What the hell are you doing here?

Lizzie: I came to help get you out, duh. I will always save you!

Red: You came out of curiosity.

Lizzie's morality: Or maybe I actually care about what happens to you! There, I said it!

Red: You need to leave!

Lizzie: Ressler and Samar have been taken hostage.

Red: They shouldn't even be here, you never should've come here. I'll get to Ressler and Samar as soon as I can, but you need to get back on that chopper.

Lizzie: Not without Ressler and Samar or You! _" Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you"_

Lizzie's morality: Now, how are we gonna stop Braxton? He has an entire team.

Red: Well, sadly, there isn't a prison on Earth where I don't know a few guys.

_Later…_

Gernert: Who is she? Who is this girl?

Red: She's with me! "_Keep your hands off my girl, Keep your hands off my girl"_

Gernert: What does that even mean? Is she your girlfriend? Your lover? Your wife? Your partner? Your lady friend?

Red: Have you ever heard of Bruno Ashmanskis? The most skilled cat burglar I've ever had the pleasure of working with. Bruno mostly did jobs on commission, but he always wanted to do something for himself, something special, so he got it into his head that he was gonna break into the Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge to steal an imperial vase from the Qing Dynasty worth millions- the single biggest trophy of his career.

Lizzie: *staring at his lips*"_I wanna have your babies, It's serious like crazy, I wanna have your babies, I see them springing up like daisy's"_

Lizzie's morality: What happened?

Red: I never heard from him again. I'd always assumed he'd succeeded, that he was sipping some umbrella-clad cocktail on a beach in Tahiti( it's a magical place), until five years later during a remodel of the Fitzwilliam, they removed a wall. There was poor Bruno-what was left of him, anyway…. stuck inside a heating duct, still clutching that vase. I prefer to think of old Bruno on that beach in Tahiti.

Gernert: Sorry to interrupt this bubbling romance, but we have a problem!

Red: What? This better be important or else….

Gernert: This model has redundant computerized safeguards. If I attempt to over-pressurize the boiler tank, those safeguards kick in automatically.

Lizzie: There's nothing you can do to override it?

Gernert: It would have to be done manually. That means someone standing here, resetting those pressure-relief valves every 90 seconds, while someone else mans the temperature controls until this pressure cooker hits 700 PSI, and that is not gonna be me!

Red: You're not going anywhere. You are so dead! *points a gun at him*

Gernert: #YOLO

Lizzie: Wait! You shoot him, they'll hear. They'll be here within 60 seconds, and then what? We can do this, you and I! _"Ain't nobody in the world but you and I, You and I, Ain't nobody in the world"_

Red: Okay, fine! # whipped # such a good hubby

Lizzie: After the pressure reaches 700, how long do we have until it explodes?

Gernert: Anywhere from 10 to 20 seconds, but there's no way to know for sure. You're better off walking away now.

Lizzie: We can do this!

Red: We're alone in a dark place, sounds like the perfect time to confess my undying love for you!

Red's heart: Keep it simple. You only have to say 3 words 8 letters: I love you!

Red: In Mexico, there are these fish that have colonized the freshwater caves along Sierra del Abra. They were lost, they found themselves living in complete darkness. But they didn't die. Instead, they thrived, they adapted. They lost their pigmentation, their sight, eventually even their eyes. With survival, they became... hideous. I've rarely thought about what I once... was. But I wonder, if a ray of light were to make it into the cave, would I be able to see it? Or feel it? Would I gravitate to its warmth? And if I did, would I become...less hideous?

Lizzie: What?

Lizzie's morality: I don't get it!

Red's heart: What did I told you to do?!

Red: I am a fish and you are my light.

Lizzie: Are you trying to say that you love me? Because I already know that, you silly!

Lizzie's morality: Maybe he's just very passionate about fish.

Red: I didn't want you to come here, follow me here. Because the truth is if I don't stop Braxton, what he'll discover is that he can't get the Fulcrum without you.

Lizzie: What does that mean "without me"?

Red: Get out of here!

_Then…_

Lizzie: Red?

Lizzie's morality: Reddington?!

Red: zzzz.

Lizzie: Breathe! Oh, my God! Red, breathe!

Lizzie's morality: Raymond Red Reddington, breathe or so help me God I'll fucking hit you in the face! Breathe, you son of a bitch! You can't leave me like this!

_More later…_

Desmond: Reddington, get up! You got to get up!

Red: Where is she?

Desmond: I count at least a dozen cells destroyed. We've got inmates in the southeast quad.

Red: You seem like a decent guy, Desmond. You should do something else for a living.

Desmond: I just told you the animals are loose. You can't get to the Nest without going through them. They're gonna kill you out there! What are you gonna do?

Red: I'm gonna get her back! "_When the screws are tightenin', and the tears are falling, I can hear her crying out to be saved, And like a bolt of lightning, I go answer the call" _*kills everyone who stands in his way and saves Lizzie*

Lizzie: My hero! Current sexuality: Red disheveled and covered in blood! *points a gun at Luther Braxton* Nobody messes with Bonnie and Clyde…..I mean with Lizzie and Red!

Red: All this, Luther, and you don't even know what the hell you're looking for.

Luther Braxton: I know what it's worth.

Red: It's not what you think. It's not a golden ticket, it's a target on your back.

Luther Braxton: I know all the stories, Red. I know where it was 20 years ago, and I know when it disappeared. I know about the house, the fire, the girl…..wait a minute! #MOMENT OF REALISATION

Lizzie: What?! #confused

Luther Braxton: No wonder you came for her. She was there that night, wasn't she? She's the one?

Red: #caught. Is it that obvious? _"You're the one that I want, You are the one I want, Oo, Oo, Oo, the one that I need, Oh yes indeed"_

Lizzie: Wait, what?

Red: Shoot him!


	28. Red saving his bae

Episode 10

_On the telephone…_

Luther Braxton: Sebastian, brother, I didn't think you made it out.

Red: He didn't, I did. Surprise, bitch! I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.

Luther Braxton: Oh, man! This is just like Belgrade, huh, boyo? Whatever you want, I get.

Red: This is nothing like Belgrade. You're out of your depth, Luther! You don't know the people you're dealing with. You're a fine thief, meticulous and careful, but this is different. You're improvising, and you and I both know thinking on your feet is not your strong suit, Luther. You will make a mistake, and when you do, I will be there to indulge in the undeniable pleasure and sweet satisfaction of "I told you so."

Luther Braxton: Well, you better hurry. 'Cause your girlfriend, the princess, she's got the answers in her head that I'm looking for, and I found a way to get them out.

Red: Oh my God! How does everyone know that she is my girlfriend? Who told you?

Anslo Garrick in the afterlife: Did you guys miss me? Of course I told Luther all I know about my lovely ship. #Lizzington4ever

_Then…_

Red: *saving his bae* Is she okay?

Dr. Selma Orchard:*screams*

Red: I'm not gonna hurt you!

Dr. Selma Orchard: Let me guess, you're her boyfriend, right?

Red: Is that obvious? Is she okay?

Dr. Selma Orchard: She's still heavily sedated.

Red: What happened? Tell me about Agent Keen.

Dr. Selma Orchard: She was undergoing a procedure called RM Therapy. Braxton was searching for a memory.

Red: Does she remember the past?

Dr. Selma Orchard: She remembers something called the Fulcrum.

Red: Does she know where it is, the Fulcrum?

Dr. Selma Orchard: No. But we were close.

Red: If she continued, would it be dangerous for her? Could she be harmed in any way?

Dr. Selma Orchard: It's hard to say. She's been through a lot. But typically, if the therapy is done properly and with great care, then no.

Red: I need you to tell me where it is. Where is the Fulcrum, Lizzie?*he touches her everywhere*

Agent Donald Ressler: Hey! Hey! What the hell are you doing to her? What are you doing? Get her up! Wake her up now!

Dr. Selma Orchard: Not now. He hasn't kissed her yet.

Red: Do you mind? We're having a moment here.*"Careless whisper" starts playing in the distance*

Agent Donald Ressler: Reddington! Reddington!

Dr. Selma Orchard: It's not safe.

Agent Donald Ressler: Wake her up now.

Dr. Selma Orchard: Wait! Not now.

Agent Donald Ressler: You do what you have to do. You do it now!

Dr. Selma Orchard: Wait! Just kiss her already!

Lizzie: *wakes up* You were there.

_Later…_

Lizzie: You were there, weren't you?

Red: Yes.

Lizzie: There were... people with the woman, looking for it. The Fulcrum. You were one of them.

Red: It's not that simple.

Lizzie: But that's why you were there. That's why you came into my life then. And that's why you're here now. Not because of me or who I am to you, whatever connection we might have, but because of some... object, some thing!

Lizzie's morality: I was rooting for you, we were all rooting for you! How dare you?!

Red: What? No! You know I love you! Whatever you remember…

Lizzie: What I remember is leaving my father dying on the floor of a burning house. There's no way he could have survived that.

Red: Lizzie, the memories of a four-year-old are unreliable.

Lizzie: My father was killed because of the Fulcrum, because you and your people came for it that night. Well, I want you to know something: this charade of you pretending to care about me was a waste of your time because I don't know where it is!

Red: Lizzie, my love, let me explain!

Lizzie: Don't! _"Get back motherfucker, You don't know me like that (Get back motherfucker, You don't know me like that)"_

Red: Why don't you just stab me in the heart right now, since it'd be less painful then going through another break-up?

Red's heart_: "Do you really want to hurt me? Do you really want to make me cry?"_

Agent Donald Ressler: Leave my sister alone! I am going to cockblock you for the rest of eternity.

Red:*sobs* _"I need a little loving tonight, Hold me so I'm not falling apart, A little but I'm hoping it might kick start, Me and my broken heart"_


	29. Anyone with eyes can see it

Episode 11

Aram Mojtabai: I've never seen anything like it. What is it?

Lizzie: I don't know. It was... I think it contains some kind of message.

Aram Mojtabai: Where'd you get it?

Lizzie's morality: I need you to see if you can figure out what it is, how it works.

Aram Mojtabai: There are people who are far more qualified at this kind of thing than me. Why don't you ask your boyfriend, Mr. Reddington?

Lizzie: He is not my boyfriend!

Red: I hope I'm interrupting.

Lizzie: Yes! Go away, Red!

Aram Mojtabai: No, no! Please don't kill me, we're just friends, I swear!

Red: You're not answering your phone.

Lizzie: So leave a message.

Lizzie's morality: By the power vested in me I now pronounce you blocked and deleted. You may now kiss my ass!

Red: Dembe did. Two, in fact. We have a new case, Agent Keen.

Lizzie's morality: Then tell Cooper.

Red: That's not how this works.

Aram Mojtabai: I think I left my soup in the microwave. Lobster bisque. # awkward Why do they always have to fight? Can't they just kiss and make up?

Lizzie's morality: I know exactly how this works: you lie, say what you need to say to make me believe you actually care…

Red: That's not true!

Lizzie: You're after the Fulcrum. It's why you're here. Not to help me or protect me or whatever spin you're selling today.

Lizzie's morality: Well, I'm not buying it. From this point on, there's no reason for us to talk unless it's about the work.

Red: Fine! Then let's work.

_Then…_

Red: The other one, the watercolorist, she-legs like a shot-putter- gets me in this headlock. I black out. Next thing I know, I wake up, no sheets, vaseline everywhere. The lipstick on the mirror overhead reads "Same time next year?" I haven't missed an art expo in Basel since.

Lizzie: Not you again!

Red: Lizzie! Please excuse me, I need to go to my wifey.

Lizzie: What are you doing here?

Red: I promised to help. I can't be an effective resource if I'm thousands of miles from the action.

Agent Donald Ressler: It's not safe! We just saw the CIA at the airport. They see you…

Red: I'll be sure to say hello. Uzbekistan has no extradition treaty with the United States.

Lizzie: Who are your friends over there? Are you drunk?

Red: Go get cleaned up. We'll have dinner. I know a wonderful little hole in the wall that's actually in a hole in the wall.

_In the elevator…_

Agent Donald Ressler: What's going on with you and Reddington? You two have a little lovers' quarrel?

Lizzie: Is that obvious?

Agent Donald Ressler: I'm sure anyone with eyes can see it.

Lizzie's morality: I don't trust him!

_Later…_

Red: Well, you certainly make friends fast.

Agent Donald Ressler: #rude. Don't let him see you cry!

Red: Truth is, I'm impressed.

Agent Donald Ressler: Really? So we can still be best friends, right?

Red: Not with you, with Ruslan. He never really struck me as a man of the people.

Agent Donald Ressler:*sobs* The guy's a psychopath! He's in over his head. He doesn't know anything about pipelines.

Red: Agent Keen is late. Where is she? Is she ok?

Agent Donald Ressler: She's having room service. What, are you in the doghouse?

Red's heart: Oh, you have no idea!

Red: Oh, that's a shame. She's gonna miss the most tantalizingly delicious khorem baklava.

_Then…_

Ruslan Denisov: I will not be negotiating this deal myself. I've decided to bring in a professional, someone to make sure that the company lawyers don't eat me for lunch.

* a wild Red appears*

Red: Mr. Denisov, it is my pleasure to be here. Hello! My name is Raymond Reddington. And you are?

Lizzie: What, what, what are you doing?

Red: I'm sorry. It's been a while since I've done one of these. Did I screw up already?

Agent Donald Ressler: You're not really gonna negotiate for Denisov, are you?

Red: Bitch I might. You're the one who insisted that our interaction be strictly professional.

Lizzie's morality: You gave us this case to help us get the agent back, not represent the other side.

Red: Agent Keen, in this world, there are no sides, only players.

Lizzie: Are we really supposed to sit here and hammer out a deal?

Red: Absolutely not! I was thinking we might get out for a bit. The first day of negotiation is rather like the first day of school.

Agent Donald Ressler: Get out? Where?

Red: Let's go on a field trip, shall we?

Agent Donald Ressler: That level of sass is too high!

_Later…_

Lizzie's morality: You told Ruslan the State Department was open to the idea of an inquiry.

Red: You haven't touched your baklava!

Lizzie's morality: You told him, and he's not interested?

Red: Just one bite.

Lizzie: I didn't come here for the baklava. I came here to talk about the negotiation!

Lizzie's morality: Then why are you staring at his lips?

Lizzie: Sorry! It's like second nature to me…..

*tango music plays*

Red: Ah…..a Russian milonga. Watch closely, Lizzie! Everything you need to know about negotiation is there in the tango milonga. At the outset, they are opponents. Each has something the other wants. They size one another up, assessing risk, setting boundaries, challenging each other to breach them.

Lizzie: Hey, that sounds exactly like our relationship!

Lizzie's libido:* heavy breathing* Is it hot in here or is it just me?

Red's libido: Did you know that you burn 2.8 calories a minute while slow dancing? Wanna work out?

Red: A sensuous battle, violence and sex, balanced on the blade of a knife.

Lizzie: Are you trying to seduce me?

Lizzie's libido: Because I wouldn't mind that in the least!

Lizzie's morality: Conceal, don't feel! Focus, Lizzie!

Red: Nothing given that is not earned, nothing taken that is not given. This is the pure essence of negotiation. Not a poker game,but a milonga, a tango, a seduction.

Lizzie:*dead*

_On the phone…_

Lizzie: Where have you been?!

Lizzie's morality: Great, you sound like a concerned wife!

Red: Good news! I've reconsidered our position. Negotiations will resume immediately.

Agent Donald Ressler: Did you talk to Denisov?

Red: No questions.

Agent Donald Ressler: Burke's dead, isn't he?

Red: No. We have new evidence to present. There is one proviso, however. That mouthpiece from Anneca, the one you spoke to? Bring him along.

Lizzie: Wait, wait! We can't leave. Kushan's doubled the guards outside. It's too risky!

Red: I may need to have a chat with this Commander Kushan. We'll come to you. See you in an hour.


	30. These two need to bone already!

**A/N**: Thank you so much for all the reviews/follow/favorites, they mean so much to me! Are you guys still alive after the finale episode? Because I'm in the Lizzington heaven.

* * *

Episode 12

Lizzie: Here we go again…. I'm going to need a lot of booze to handle this shit!

Lizzie's morality: DMV? Really? I've never even seen you drive.

Red: That little fella, the one through the glass, his name is Glen Carter. His mother calls him "Jelly Bean." A loathsome individual who, sad to say, possesses an uncanny ability to locate anything. I presume you've heard of Justin Kenyon?

Lizzie: I hate Raymond Red Reddington and his stupid face and his stupid eyes and his stupid smile and his stupid voice and his stupid body and his stupid EVERYTHING!

Lizzie's morality: The smiling public face of the militia movement. Who hasn't?

Red: Yes. The very voice of reason, the rebel darling of the fringe right-charming, rustic, camera-ready, the perfect spokesman to spin vile hatred and prejudice into treacly dross that passes for plainspoken common sense.

Lizzie: Is it necessary to sit this close to me? Ever heard of personal space?

Red: No, what is that?

Lizzie's morality: Forget it.

Red: *radiating innocence* What?

Lizzie's morality: Hoe don't do it!

Red: Excuse me?

Lizzie's morality: Justice knows exactly who Justin Kenyon is. We know what he is. The Church of the Shield is a cesspool of polygamy, doomsday paranoia, ritualized elder and child abuse, but he also has four of the most prominent civil rights attorneys in the country on retainer- we can't touch him.

Red: I can.

Lizzie's morality: Oh my god!

_On the phone…_

Red: Samar, my dear, bump in the road I can help smooth over, or have the clouds finally parted and this is a social call?

Samar Navabi: She's missing.

Red: What?! Not my Lizzie!

Samar Navabi: They were supposed to deliver a witness two hours ago. They haven't been seen since they left Kenyon's compound.

Red: Have you mounted a search?

Samar Navabi: I'm on my way out to assist HRT, but there are hundreds of square miles of rugged terrain. It could take days.

Red: Don't worry, Lizzie, I'm gonna save you! "_Someone's gonna rescue you, And make it right, Someone's gonna rescue you, Someone's gonna rescue you"_

_Later…_

Lizzie: Not you again!

Red:*smiling* Hello, sweetheart!

Lizzie's morality: ATF's been over the grounds. They've searched the buried containers.

Lizzie: What's this?

Red: A key…to my heart! _"I know I've found my dream, You're the key to my heart, my heart, You're the only one for me, I knew it right from the start, the start"_

Lizzie: Yeah, no thanks!

Red: I bought you an apartment at the Audrey, top floor, splendid view of the Potomac.

Lizzie: Why?

Red: It's time to leave the motel behind.

Lizzie: I'm happy where I am.

Red: That motor lodge you call home crushes the spirit, smothers the soul.

Lizzie: And you think a view is gonna change that?

Red: I once stayed at a villa in Bali with a view of the Indian Ocean. Every morning, all I saw before me was... possibility. That and a gorgeous housekeeper named Putu, who used to…

Lizzie: Thanks, but no thanks. I'm not drunk enough for this shit! I wish you'd stop.

Red: Stop what?

Lizzie: Trying. Stop hoping things are gonna get better between us. You and me, it's just business! That's all it's ever gonna be!

Red:#rejected. _"All by myself, Don't wanna be, All by myself, anymore"_

Episode 13

Red: A graduate seminar. Was there a slide show?

Red's libido: I've been a naughty school boy. You should teach me a lesson!

Lizzie: What?!

Red: We need to talk about the Fulcrum!

Lizzie: Frick! He knows… I'm so screwed! And not in a good way.

Lizzie's morality: I told you, I don't know anything about it!

Red: Elizabeth, one of the reasons I'm still alive is due to my love of reading, whether it be words on a page that reveal the author's thoughts, emotions, imagination, or whether it be people in conversation, to ignore what they say and instead read their expression, posture, their gesture.

Lizzie: Oh, no! Does that mean that he knows that I still love him and his stupid face so much?

Red: Lizzie, you're lying!

Lizzie's morality: I'm not! *nervous sweating intensifies*

Red: What if we made a deal? I help you find your serial killer, and you tell me about the Fulcrum.

_Then…_

Red: This brute they call "The Deer Hunter" isn't a buck at all, but instead a delicate doe.

Agent Donald Ressler: A woman?

Lizzie: I disagree with you.

Red: Okay. But your killer attacks from a distance, indicating the predator's smaller, perhaps unable to overpower their prey. Men tend to kill in close proximity- strangulation, blunt instrument, a knife. By contrast, women tend to favor weapons that can be used from further away- poison, a gun, a crossbow.

Lizzie: Richard Kuklinski was 6'5", 300 pounds, and one of his favorite weapons of choice was cyanide.

Aram Mojtabai: Wow, this is so intense!

Samar Navabi: These two need to bone already!

Red: Yes, but male serial killers are predominantly, overwhelmingly sexually sadistic. In this case, there is not the slightest indication of a sexual motive.

Lizzie: Aileen Wuornos was a prostitute who lured her victims in with the promise of sex.

Red's libido: Am I the only one aroused by this?

Lizzie's libido: No!

Red's libido: My place or yours?

*"You can leave your hat on" starts playing in the distance*

Red: The Deer Hunter has been active for over a decade, from the truck driver in Des Moines in 2003 to the doorman in Adams Morgan last night. That's 12 years. The average length of a killing spree for a man is two, perhaps three.

_Later…_

Red: You all right?

Lizzie: Yeah, fine.

Red: What were you thinking running after a killer alone without backup?

Lizzie: Are you scolding me?

Red: Yes, I'm scolding you! That was foolish, Lizzie. You could have been killed.

Lizzie: What are you gonna do? Ground me? Take away my phone privileges?

Red: Are you fucking kidding me?

Red's heart: Seriously?!

Red's libido: Excuse me? If you do that one more time, I'm going to have to pull your pants down and spank you later!

Red: You were right about "The Deer Hunter"- he was a man.

Lizzie's morality: And a woman. We were both half right.

Red: Together, we were right!

Lizzie: Awww ^_^

Lizzie's morality: I have the Fulcrum. Tell me what it is, and I'll tell you where to find it.

Red: I've already told you what I can. To elaborate would place you in grave danger!

Lizzie: I don't want to hear any more, I'm leaving!

Red: I believe I know the real reason you don't want me to have the Fulcrum.

Lizzie: That is...?

Red: Because you're afraid... that once you give it to me, you'll be of no further use to me and you'll never see me again.

Lizzie: Crap! He knows…


	31. Perhaps you'd like a piece of that

I'm still alive! Enjoy :)

* * *

Episode 14

Red: I hope you're considering the apartment at the Audrey. You must stop living like this!

Lizzie's morality: By all means, come right in. Make yourself at home, because I love it when you do that! Where is that pen when you need it?

Lizzie: I know that misery loves company, but please leave me off of your guest list!

Red: I think it's time I tell you what people are saying behind your back:"Nice ass!"

Red's libido: OMG! She is wearing a bathrobe. This is not a drill. I repeat, this is not a drill!

Red: Madeline Pratt has been abducted.

Lizzie:*jealousy mode activated* What do you care? She almost got us both killed.

Red: Foreplay. My relationship with Madeline is... nuanced. Confounding, yet captivating, she's a singular woman, and the world is far more interesting with her in it. What's more, her abductors meet every requisite that defines inclusion on the Blacklist.

Lizzie:"_Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah, Coming out your mouth with your blah blah blah"_

_Later…_

Samar Navabi: Her instructions were to introduce herself to the concierge at The Harleston Read Hotel.

Lizzie: Owned by the King family trust. Everyone there is on their payroll.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: That's it?

Lizzie: She's supposed to ask for a room with a view of the Capitol.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Then what?

Samar Navabi: She'd get a room number. After that, no idea. She's never attended the auction. Beyond the hotel and the password, we have nothing.

Lizzie: That's not necessarily true. They're expecting an American named Josephine Sullivan. We can give them that.

Assistant Director Harold Cooper: Undercover? Forget it!

Samar Navabi: I know you want him back, but there has to be another way.

Lizzie: Bitch please, I'm fabulous!

Lizzie's morality: "_I am a woman on a mission whoa, Nothing can stop me, I'm stronger than ever, I'm gonna see this through, I am a woman on a mission whoa, Whatever it takes I will do what I gotta do"_

_Then…_

Tyler King: So, which Ivy League did you attend? It's no secret Alexi fancies a certain breed.

Lizzie: Ha ha, please stop!

Lizzie's morality: Columbia, then Princeton.

Tyler King: Really? I'm a Princeton man.

Lizzie: Mm…great!

Tyler King: The Dinky was such fun, wasn't it?

Lizzie: Such fun, very wow!

Red: Oh, the Dinky. No matter the time of day, that damn train is always full of hungover frat boys and co-eds in the throes of morning-after regret. I just saved your ass, Lizzie…. do I get a little kiss?

Red's libido: That dress looks great on you...as a matter of fact, so would I.

Lizzie: My bae! I've come to rescue you!

Lizzie's morality: Is that who I think it is?

Francis King: Well, I can see that you are a woman of good taste. Tyler, I believe the Sheikh has questions about your guidance chips. GTFO!

Lizzie: The Raymond Reddington….impossible!

Lizzie's libido: Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good!

Red: You've changed your hair.

Francis King: You know each other.

Lizzie: Unfortunately. He left me for his ex. (╥﹏╥)

Francis King: Perhaps you'd like a piece of that… I mean maybe you'd like to make a bid.

Lizzie's morality: I've heard he's far more trouble than he's worth. It's probably easier to let someone else buy him. Let him be their problem. I'm here for the Van Gogh! He's probably out of my price range, anyway.

Yaabari: Not mine. Surprise, bitch! I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.

Red: Frick!

Lizzie: Frack!

_Later…._

Lizzie's morality: We have to get these people out of here. How do you open this thing?

Red: Lizzie, you need to go!

Lizzie: Damn it! What's the code?

Red: Listen to me! I was brought in through a series of tunnels that way. If you hurry, you'll be miles away before they ever realize you're gone. Take the boy and go!

Lizzie: You could be killed!

Red: Lizzie, you did everything you could. It's time to go. Go!

Lizzie: "_Goodbye my lover, Goodbye my friend, You have been the one, You have been the one for me_"

_Then…_

Yaabari: Try not to take it personally. Business is business. In fact, Raymond, I've always been quite fond of you.

Red: Can't tell you what a comfort that is to me. If I have to die this way, at least Lizzie is safe!

Lizzie:* shoots Yaabari* Nobody messes with my boyfriend!

Red: Lizzie, my love! The handcuff key's in his back pocket.

Lizzie's morality: Okay. Someone's gonna come back. We got to get out of here!

_Later…_

Red: Surprise, bitch! I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me. If that hammer falls on an empty chamber, you'll be dead before you hit the ground! Put it down!

Lizzie: Nobody messes with Bonnie and Clyde!

Red: #swag. Earl, someone should have put you out of your misery generations ago. *shoots Earl* Oh, my God! What are the odds? I'll leave the three of you to your own misery. Avoid the yard, be nice to your cell mate, and whatever you do, don't eat the franks and beans. Oh, and I don't need your lousy tux, I want my clothes back!

Lizzie: Baby, you're the greatest!

_More later…._

Lizzie: There you are!

Red: You can never do that again!

Lizzie: You're welcome.

Red: I'm serious. You can never do that again! Promise me!

Lizzie's morality: We took down dozens of wanted criminals, recovered millions of dollars in stolen property, and saved innocent lives.

Red: I'm not talking about that.

Lizzie's morality: You….you're talking about you. Wow! You are so damaged! You can't accept help from anyone. Has anyone ever helped you? Is that why you are the way you are? Because you don't feel deserving of it? Is that why you can't be vulnerable for a second?

Red: (◕︵◕)

Lizzie: I risked my life for you because I care about you! Deal with that.

Lizzie's morality: And when someone does something nice, you're supposed to say "Thank you."

Red: Thank you!

Lizzie: You're welcome.

Red: But never do it again!

Lizzie: Are you fucking kidding me?! I want to strangle you right now!


End file.
